


Saw You In A Dream

by sunflwr_cherry



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Shingeki no Kyojin Fusion, Angst, Cute Erwin Smith, Cute Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), F/M, Fluff, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Inspired by K-Drama | Korean Drama, My First Work in This Fandom, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan References, Shingeki no Kyojin: Kuinaki Sentaku | Attack on Titan: No Regrets, Shingeki no Kyojin: Kuinaki Sentaku | Attack on Titan: No Regrets Spoilers, Slow Burn, Slow Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2021-02-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 18:55:47
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 42,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24980434
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sunflwr_cherry/pseuds/sunflwr_cherry
Summary: It might've been just a sweet dream or a terrible nightmare, but by the time she wakes up, it becomes her reality.
Relationships: Erwin Smith/Mike Zacharias, Erwin Smith/Reader, Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin)/Reader, Levi/Erwin Smith, Levi/Erwin Smith/Reader, Levi/Reader, Moblit Berner/Hange Zoë, Nanaba & Mike Zacharias
Comments: 68
Kudos: 193





	1. New Recruits

_With one sharp cut across it's nape, she was able to topple down a titan that was about 15 meters high. She catches her breath at a nearby roof, with traces of titan blood evaporating on her. At a glance, she sees an abnormal running towards her, with quick reflexes, she jumps from one roof to another. She was confused as to why she was just running away from it instead of actually killing._

_She might run out of gas anytime soon, but she couldn't protest against her body moving further away from the titan. Until she went a full halt. Slowly she was fall-_

A big gasp leaves her mouth when she woke up, and a sigh of relief followed right after realizing it was all a dream. She grabs her pocketbook from underneath her bed and started to write.

> _22nd of July, 844_
> 
> _Chased by an abnormal titan, couldn't fight it, ran out of gas, and fell. Might be the end, I don't know._

It has become her habit to take note of her dreams as soon as she woke up, at least those dreams that she was sure was possible to happen. She does hope none of those would happen, but considering the reality they lived in, anything was possible.

Watching as the morning sun drowns the room, and shone all on her roommates' dreadful faces, she stretches, and heads down to the restrooms to get ready for the day. She honestly doesn't know what to expect for the day, except that they were supposed to learn Captain Erwin Smith's _Long-distance Formation_ or something along those lines. 

She continues to wash her face and only paused to look at herself in the mirror for any missed spots. Satisfied, she walks back to the room to get changed. 

She thought about sitting outside for a while since she woke up earlier than expected. It's nice to calm down after almost having a heart attack on that dream. The birds chirped sweetly as they perched on a nearby tree. 

"Up so early, (Y/L/N)?" turning to see who it was, she was surprised to see Erwin Smith just few meters away from her. 

She salutes quickly as if it's become a muscle reflex. "Good morning, Captain!"

"Good morning, I'm quite surprised to see that someone else actually comes by this place, especially at this time." 

"Oh, I don't come by often. It's just when I wanna clear my mind off of something." She fiddles with her fingers behind her, trying not to look nervous around him. 

"I am not _disturbing_ you, am I? _" Of course he kinda did,_ but it would've been disrespectful if she agreed to his words. 

"Oh no, it's alright, Captain."

"Okay, but just to remind you I wouldn't want to miss my breakfast especially on such an eventful day." She almost wanted to groan, because when he says 'eventful', he actually means it. 

"Of course I wouldn't!" She catches his small smile, he must've caught on the fact that she was nervous. Erwin seems aware that a lot do find him intimidating, even if he was just being casual. He doesn't mean it, it just how he came to be. 

"Well then, have a great day."

"You too, Captain."

With one more salute, she was out of the place. She was trying so hard not to blush right in front of him, thankful that she was against the sunlight when he came. She has always admired the man for being really smart, tactical, and for being a great leader. It's not a surprise that his squad has zero casualties. 

Just by thinking about their encounter, she felt her cheeks flush once more. She continues on to the mess hall. 

"Hey, (Y/N)! Where were you?" Hannah Wagner, one of her roommates and close friends softly nudges her to the side as she settled on the opposite seat. "And why are your cheeks so red?"

Touching them herself, they were still warm. "I was catching some fresh air and the sun was out, I wouldn't want to wake you up just yet, not when you're drooling." Making sure to whisper the last part, she didn't want anyone else to draw attention on how her friend looked like asleep.

"It really had to be me, huh?" A deeper voice emerges from behind you and sat beside. Almost dropping her food at such force when she set her tray. It was their other close friend, Lia Strauss. "Gross." 

Even with such a stern tone, Lia was cared for them more than anyone. She just doesn't know how exactly to be sweet, but despite sounding angry most of the time, they know she's just looking out for them. 

"Stop acting like you're any better than me, Strauss." Hannah playfully rolls her eyes before taking a bite of her bread.

* * *

The squads were all gathered on the grounds. Thinking that they might have a few announcements before the start of training, everyone was just chatting casually before Commander Keith Shadis came up to the platform. 

Strangely, three people whom (Y/N) haven't met before came after him. They were wearing the same uniforms as them, but they all looked new to her.

"They are new members of the Survey Corps," everyone gasped at the new announcement. "Please introduce yourselves." The Commander falls back behind so they can start their introductions.

The one in the middle seems to have caught (Y/N)'s attention the most. He gives everyone a judging look all while crossing his arms.

"The name's Levi." She felt bothered because he looked so smug, he mustn't have gone through proper training. The instructor wouldn't have tolerated that behavior. 

Commander Shadis noticed his attitude as well, "What you need is discipline!" (Y/N) could hear people snicker behind her, but she wasn't the one who was too quick to judge. 

The cheerful girl with red hair introduces herself as Isabel Magnolia, and the taller guy was Furlan Church. The three new members were all assigned to the same squad as (Y/N) by the Commander.

"B-but Commander! Shouldn't Erwin be the one to take over these three? After all, he was the one who let them in!" Judging by the tone of Captain Flagon Turret, he had a certain dislike for the new recruits especially after knowing they were former thugs from the underground.

"No Flagon, Erwin's taking care of the formation. I'm sure they wouldn't be such a pain in the ass."

"I- yes, Commander!" Captain Flagon seems hesitant, but he would much rather take care of the three than serve time for insubordination.

* * *

"Have you been riding horses your whole life?" (Y/N) asks Isabel who seems to have tamed the horse easily just few moments before getting on it and riding around the grounds.

"No, I just love animals. I believe it's easier to tame them when you show them good intentions." Isabel runs her fingers through the horse's mane. "Trust is important."

She agrees, with such a tough job they have, it was important that everyone has to put their faith in their superiors who always have to think twice before giving instructions, and to their fellow officers who swore to protect other people's lives. 

(Y/N) looks around to where her friends were as Isabel runs off again. She saw Lia talking to Furlan, possibly about hand to hand combat. But even then, she's never seen Lia be this talkative, (Y/N) was sure there was something different about the way Lia moved. No matter how long you've been with someone, you always learn something new about them everyday. She thought.

Behind them, (Y/N) noticed a small crowd watching the forest, strange. She came up to them and and heard her captain arguing with someone.

"The blades weren't designed to be held like that!"

Levi holds one blade backwards, the same way a person would hold a dagger or knife when trying to stab someone. Where did this guy actually come from?

"You're just gonna kill the titan right? I'm doing it my way." He bolts through the forest with his gear. She was surprised with how well he used it. She was so sure she's never seen him even during their training days.

They all went to check out what happened to Levi, and were all surprised to see that he really did cut through the titan dummy's nape in a single slash.

Hange starts talking about how everyone has different ways to kill a titan, the fact that she's very observant holds useful for the Survey Corps in studying new ways for attack. (Y/N) knows that Hange would make a great leader someday.

"You think you can top that?" Captain Flagon nudges her as he points to the dummy Levi just hit.

"No," she shakes her head and left her captain shocked. "He has a unique style – so do I." 

"Well, I have never heard you back down from a competition, (Y/L/N)." 

She smiles, "I don't see him that way," Captain Flagon turns away getting ready to leave. "However," he pauses.

"It seems like his style isn't very efficient, did you see how much gas he used?"

He nods in agreement.

(Y/N) acknowledged the flaw in his technique, but she was still impressed. "When you think about it, does it matter though? When killing titans you have to give your all."

Captain Flagon sighs, "Have it your way, as long as you know you ain't getting yourself killed " And flew off.

She turns her sight to Levi, who was dusting his cloak which had debris from the material of the titan's nape. She heard her cursing to himself as she approached.

"I'm amazed, were you given formal training? I'm sure I haven't seen you around."

"Tch," He surely wasn't very sociable. He starts to walk around while checking for dirt on himself, and to get farther from her. But she was just trailing behind.

"Your technique was so cool! I've never seen anyone hold their blades like that."

"Tch."

"Oh, okay? Should I take that as a yes or no?" Levi who was now annoyed more than ever, stopped in his tracks and turns to her. They were only a few inches apart and (Y/N) could feel his heavy breathing. That wasn't good.

"You should take it as 'none of your business.'"

Instead of glaring back or be pissed, he was surprised when she just shrugged, "I see, I won't ask again."

She looked up to the branches when she heard the familiar whizz of their vertical maneuver gear. 

"Why are y'all still here? It's lunch!" Hannah says as she herself makes her way out of the forest. The two glanced at each other as they prepared to leave. Levi was the first to make a jump.

As he flies through the trees, (Y/N) caught up by his side. "If I were you, I wouldn't be doing flips midair. It's a waste of gas."

"Whatever."

When they landed on the grounds, they saw Hannah, Lia, Furlan, and Isabel standing by and waiting. 

* * *

Everyone was chatting in the mess hall as they munched down on their meals. The activities they had for the day weren't even done yet, but they all felt exhausted. Erwin really did mean it when he said 'eventful'.

"I saw (Y/N) talking to the new guy earlier." Hannah looks at (Y/N) maliciously as she plays with her fork. "They looked like they were about to ki-"

"You shouldn't trust people so quickly, (Y/N)." Lia cuts in, without glancing up to any of the two. Levi and his friends sat on the table by the window which was just on (Y/N)'s line of sight. He seems to have the same mood whether he was with his friends or not.

"You shouldn't judge them too quickly as well, Strauss." It's become a custom for the three of them to call each other by the last names when scolding. "And besides, it's not like I haven't seen you talk to that Furlan guy earlier."

Lia chokes, and was quick to gulp on her water. "He was just asking for a good way to injure someone's arm. Nothing else."

"Exactly, I was just asking about where he learned to use the gear so well."

"And?"

"He didn't wanna answer."

What was he so mysterious for? She couldn't help but glance at him, blocking all the noise around her just to focus on him. His dull eyes surely hid secrets dying to be let out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello :)) this is actually my first fanfic here! And I know that the details aren't really the same as the ones in the anime/manga, but I had to change it up a bit + this story is loosely inspired by the Korean Drama While You Were Sleeping. Thanks for reading!


	2. Hand-to-hand

(Y/N) sits up on her bed, with eyes still closed, and a case of severe bed head. She didn't dream anything important really, and she's just forgotten about it. Except for one detail.

> _25th of July, 844_
> 
> _A draw?_

She hid her journal right after writing those words. She stretched and got up to get ready for the day. As far as she knows, there wasn't really anything worthwhile to do. She thought about just working out and do some shadow boxing. 

She walks through the hallways of the headquarters all while wrapping her hands with bandages. She wasn't worrying with bumping into someone, considering everyone else must've taken the opportunity to just sleep in.

It wasn't until she was about to tie the ends on her left hand when she bumped into someone. She almost fell backwards if they weren't so quick to catch her by the small of her back.

"Take it easy there." The deep voice she was familiar with made her jump. They were almost a foot taller and it was only when she looked up to see who it was.

"Oh God, good morning Captain! I'm really sorry, I was being careless." She stumbles, but regained balance as he held her arm.

Captain Erwin Smith just stood there with a small grin. "I wouldn't want to fall before I could even get to punch." The small gesture was enough to make her as red as a cherry. "You're not picking up any fights, are you, (Y/L/N)?"

"No Captain! I-I was about to... workout and stuff." 

"Good," He looks behind and back at her. "Guess I'll see you around, have a nice day." And walks away.

Weird, he's never passed by the sleeping quarters before, as far as she was aware. He stopped for a brief moment by the males' dorm and continues.

_He just said 'have a nice day', he was just being polite, (Y/N)._ She thought to herself as she continues to walk. 

_"So, you didn't find anything?"_ A girl's voice speaks up behind.

_"Shut up! Someone might hear you."_ A male voice snapped back. She realized that the voices were coming her way. 

"Good morning (Y/N)!" The same voice greeted her from behind, it was Isabel. Like always, she was with Furlan and Levi. 

"Good morning! Where are y'all headed to?"

Furlan shrugs, "I don't know, maybe the grounds? We don't know the places yet."

The sun has already come through the windows, today might be a good day.

"I'll show you, I'm heading out anyways." Both Isabel and Furlan agree as (Y/N) tugged them both softly.

Levi chimes in, still falling behind the three. "No need."

"Don't mind _Brother,_ he's really bad with words." Isabel tugs the girl closer as she whispers into her ears.

* * *

As the three sat under a big tree, (Y/N) kept throwing punches in the air with such strength. Jumping slightly to switch positions as she punched. Sweat ran down her face and she was breathing rather deeply.

She came to a halt when she saw her Captain come by with his horse.

"Practicing hand to hand?" He shouts, then proceeded to climb down his horse. "You sure are using your time wisely."

Isabel cheers on and clapping her hands. "That was impressive, (Y/N)!"

"Huh, that'd be a different case when she's actually given an opponent." Levi snaps, like he always does. 

"Brother!" 

(Y/N) huffs in disbelief, she wanted to keep her cool, but this man was challenging her otherwise. "Excuse _me_?" She shakes her arms and approaches him, "I think you haven't seen me move yet."

He stands up, he wasn't even close to being intimidated. "I think I've seen _enough_."

The two glared at each other and were ready to fight. (Y/N) wasn't one to use her strength when someone talks her down, but Levi wasn't someone who would settle for less.

Captain Flagon, who was just watching the two bicker, suddenly came up with a plan. "This reminds me... Levi, how about you two have a short sparring? After all, you have to go through the same training as the others did."

"Fine by me." She turns around and walked to the big space. "Don't go easy on me, Levi."

"Sure, that's what crybabies say."

By this time, a lot more people have come to see the two. Including the Squad Leaders. 

"Alright, on your mark..."

Levi was as calm as he could be, but who knows what this man can do? 

(Y/N) was known to be levelheaded, people wouldn't assume that she topped hand-to-hand combats the first time they meet.

"Go!"

This should be quick, Captain Flagon thought to himself as the two tackled each other. 

Levi managed to dodge numerous punches, but as he was about to kick her in the side of her knee, she grabs his leg and pulls him down. With such quick reflexes, he was able to grab her by the arm and throw her to the ground.

_Fuck, she's stronger than I thought._

_What? He calculated my every move!_

Levi had the upper hand and was ready to throw a punch, but she held his free arm, about to twist it when suddenly...

"Time's up!" She pushes Levi to her side instead and they were both lying on the ground. Everyone was either cheering or disappointed that it had to end so soon. No one knew who would've won at that point. 

(Y/N) stood up and gave Levi a helping, but he stood up on his own. 

"That looks like a draw to me." Captain Erwin whispers to Captain Flagon who in return mutters a small _you think so?_

"It's a draw!" Captain Flagon shouts to everyone watching, it was quite a shock to hear that someone would actually equal (Y/N), even more so a new recruit. Even the Captain seemed to have a change in his opinion on Levi ever since he saw him hit that dummy titan.

It was when she reached out to shake hands with Levi that she suddenly remembered.

_Wasn't this my dream? A draw? It can't be._

"You seem dissatisfied," Levi withdraws his hand after a firm shake. "Aren't you happy you ruined my outfit?"

She shakes the thought away, "N-no, that was great. I'm just wondering wh-"

"(Y/N)! Are you okay? Did you get hurt?" Hannah and Lia rush to her, checking her arms for anything.

"Levi! (Y/N)! That was so awesome! I must say, you two could make a pretty good team." Hange squeals, leaving the two roll their eyes. "A power coup- I mean a dream team, that sounds perfect."

"As if," Levi walks to the opposite direction, Isabel and Furlan were quick to give him water as they left the grounds. Isabel turned back to give (Y/N) two thumbs up and a giant grin. 

(Y/N) stood there, still thinking about what just happened. The crowd was already dissipating, but she remained there, tears starting to fall.

"Hey, what's wrong? You're not like this when you lose." Lia puts a hand on her shoulder. 

"No, it's not that."

"Then what exactly are you crying for?"

"The dreams are back."

* * *

Dinner went by, she still feels gloomy due to what she found out. She barely even touched her food. Her friends try to sympathize, but it was hard for them especially that they don't know what it feels like, let alone be explained why it happens.

She sighs, "I'll head out, you two can go ahead." She stood up and left the mess hall without saying another word.

They hate having her go through painful experiences on her own. The best they could do was respect her emotions.

She sat down on the grass. Watching the moonlight, she sighs deeply, tears rolling down her cheeks once more. She let them fall down the grass, she didn't care if anyone saw her at all. 

" _You can't change it?_ Why can't I?" Her sobs have become louder now. "Why... can't... I?!" Her hands tightened their grip on the grass.

"You're not crying over that fight, are you?" Levi asks in such an obnoxious tone that would've sent (Y/N) flying another fist on his face, but she didn't care. He sits down with some distance away from her.

"I'm not petty." There was a sharp constriction in her throat when she started to speak. "It's something bigger than that. And none of your business."

He scoffs, with his attention on the bruise on his knuckles.

"And why are you here exactly?" She asks with an even more annoying tone. 

He looks up to the lit room about two stories up, you both could see Captain Erwin pacing back and forth. "Tch, none of your business."

She rolls her eyes, and dried her cheeks with the cuff of her shirt. She felt guilty she challenged Levi to spar without any bandage on his knuckles.

"Sorry about earlier, I was a bit carried away. I didn't let you get any protective equipment before the training." She looks at his knuckles, they sure looked painful. And there was a small cut on the side of his neck that looked untreated, he must've not noticed it yet.

She moves closer to him, making him move an inch further. "Don't worry, my hands are all clean." She softly grabs his bruised hand and took an extra bandage from one of her pockets. She wrapped it carefully and tied it. He didn't even flinch, he was confused as to why she'd help someone whom he only hated since the day they became part of the Survey Corps. As he was about to move further away, she mouths a small _wait_.

She grabs a small disinfectant and pressed it unto the cut on his neck. He could feel her fingertips brush on his skin. He wasn't exactly ticklish, but the feeling felt so foreign to him that he jumped slightly. 

"You know, I was surprised that you came up with such strong counterattacks." She stops to get a plaster, part of him thought that she shouldn't have.

" _No offense_ , but your moves were _predictable_."

She laughs, he noticed there was still a tone of being hurt to it, wondering what she was crying about just few moments ago. "You've gotta be kidding me." She places a plaster securely on the cut. 

"I once fought with someone who had a similar technique with you."

"You couldn't have had a fist fight with my dad, he was the one who taught me hand-to-hand combat techniques."

He shrugs, "But it was a good technique. It wouldn't have been a draw if you weren't thinking."

A few people were also walking about, conversing, and doing couple stuff under the moonlight. For a moment there, it felt like she was talking to a different person, it wasn't long till they looked at each other in the eyes. 

She stands up straightening her pants and dusting pieces of grass that stuck to it. "I should get going, I'm feeling a lot better now." She lied. She just needed to move farther, as it might get too awkward.

"Huh, your guilt's now running low because you helped me?" He stood up as well, taking another glance at the lit room, "But thanks."

"Nah, I was just glad that you weren't making too many shitty remarks about me. I only helped because I wanted to, _not that you needed any of it._ " Making sure to emphasize the last one to not hurt his ego. 

She walks further away before pausing. He could see that she indeed was in a better mood than when he found her pulling grass. "I'm sorry about your outfit, it wouldn't have been soiled if you saw _me throwing you_ coming." And she heads off.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for the kudos and hits! I really appreciate you guys enjoying the first chapter <333 :>


	3. Home

The scouts were given three days to go back to their hometowns as the trainings were getting more frequent in preparation for the next expedition. (Y/N) has been overthinking her dreams more and more each day, writing as much detail as possible even when they don't seem to be that important. Fortunately none of those dreams came true after the last one. 

Passing through the fairly crowded streets, she comes across her favorite pastry shop and decided to pop in. Soon as she entered she was immediately engulfed by the smell of newly baked pies, bread, and other mouthwatering food. Someone was reading a newspaper on the counter when she approached, smiling when she knew who it was.

"Hey, (Y/N)! How've you been?" Setting his newspaper aside, Jacob Beaumont turns his attention to the (H/C) haired girl. "I haven't seen you in some time."

"The Corps' just been really busy the past months, thanks. How about you?" His facial expression changing ever so slightly at the mention of the Survey Corps.

"Hm, I see. It must be hard, but it's an _honor_ to protect humanity from threats, isn't it?"

"Yeah, exactly. Anyway, I'd like to get two apple pies, please."

Jacob has been (Y/N)'s neighbor for almost a year now. She didn't know much about him, other than the fact that he's about the same age as her, works part-time at the pastry shop, and he asks a lot about what soldiers do. He seems generally interested in their work and has mentioned about getting drafted a couple times, she wonders how he hasn't yet.

"Would that be all?" He asks as he gives her the pies in boxes. She shakes her head slightly and gave him the money. "Well, have a nice day. And also tell your dad I said hi."

"Sure, have a nice day as well. Thank you!" She gives him a warm smile and a wave goodbye before exiting the place. 

It was such comforting feeling to be walking towards their house. It's been months since she got to taste her dad's cooking, been annoyed by her brother, and sleep on her bed. It felt like she deserved the small break after all the stress she came upon.

She hears the familiar sound of the wind chimes outside her bedroom window. The soft breeze brushing on her skin as she nears the walkway to her home. 

Exhaling deeply, she knocks on the door three times before anyone opened. She was welcomed by her dad's warm embrace, aside from the food, this was the thing that she longed for the most.

"Welcome home, sweetie!" Victor squishes her face before dragging her inside. He was quick to ask whether she lost her weight or not and insisted that she should eat whatever she can.

"Oh no, dad. I've always looked like this, I can't change that."

"Yeah, you've always looked ugly." That familiar annoying voice buts in which made her turn about. It was Pierre, her older brother along with his wife, Camille.

Camille playfully swats Pierre's shoulder when he made the stupid remark. "Shut up, (Y/N) looks so much better than you do." They both give the girl a tight hug and told her about how they were immediately notified by her father about her visit home. 

"Where's Margot? I miss that kid so much!" She looks around for signs of her niece, but to no avail.

"She didn't wanna miss school, so we had to leave her with Camille's parents for today. But she did ask me to tell you that she misses you and she'll see you the next time you'll be home." 

Margot was really smart for a kid her age, they've always thought that she took it from (Y/N) which was true, but she always brushed it off as her own gift. 

_"I just tell her jokes about things and she checks the facts if she knew, it's you guys who taught her to be brainy and all."_ She'd tell them all the time, not wanting to discredit Pierre and Camille.

* * *

"So how's it been in the Corps?" Victor speaks up as he finishes the last of his meal. All the stew he made was finished after everyone went for seconds and thirds. 

Thinking back to all that happened in the span of a week, it was tiring, and somehow everything felt different. "Well, we just had new recruits, and they're good, like _incredibly good_." She shrugs, sipping on her water. "And there's this guy who holds blades like they're knives, I don't know, that was a first."

Camille eyes her so intently, she must've thought about it the wrong way. "So do you _like_ that guy?" 

"I-"

"Huh, if there was someone (Y/N) would like, that's Captain Erwin Smith." 

She kicks his incredibly long legs under the table, enough to make him wince and check for bruises. "Cut it, Pierre."

Pierre continues after catching her off guard. Well to be fair, he was the only guy that caught so much of her attention. "You know, that Squad Leader who has crazy eyebrows? Damn I'd be head over heels for that man."

"Oh, yeah, I know that guy." Camille recalls back to when she was young, "We used to be in the same class. And believe me, he was _really smart_. He used to ask a lot of questions that even teachers themselves don't know how to answer. He probably takes after his father."

(Y/N) looks at her in surprise, "His father? You know the man?"

"Mr. Smith used to teach us History, then one day, we just got a new teacher and we were told that he won't be able to join us anymore. No one wanted to ask Erwin why either."

Pierre taps his spoon on his lips, "Mysterious background, smart as _hell_ , and blond. Is that your type, (Y/N)?" 

"You don't really shut up, do you?" If she had money for every time she starts to flush when talking about Erwin, she'd be set for life.

Victor just sat there enjoying the bickering between his children, he kind of missed having a noisy house. 

"I almost forgot, he's also most likely to ask you to dedicate your heart..." 

"Aww, that's cute." Camille buts in. The couple are just having fun on teasing her as she hides her face in embarrassment.

"...To humanity!" Pierre finishes his sentence in a mocking tone.

" _Of course_ , to humanity." Camille mocks once more, leaving everyone in fits of laughter.

* * *

Victor and (Y/N) sat under the tree by the river near their house while Pierre and Camille were skipping rocks. Camille and (Y/N) thought it was a stupid idea, considering the current. But Pierre being himself, nothing really seems to stop him.

"Sorry about your brother earlier, he really likes to get on your nerves, does he?" Her father gives her an apologetic look, but she brushes it off.

"It's alright, I miss watching him being a jerk."

The two now stopped skipping rocks and just sat on the river bank. They look so happy, something (Y/N) has been wishing for herself for some time. 

She never even considered getting into a relationship before, she was afraid of getting too attached. Maybe she had a fling or two, but it never went past that. _Maybe if she wasn't in the Corps and that her life wasn't in so much risk all the time._

Pierre stands up, picking the small flowers and giving them to Camille. She was very glad to accept them, putting one on her hair and another on Pierre's ear. She kisses his forehead and rested her head on his shoulder. 

"You haven't talked about how your life is outside the Corps, have you been seeing someone?"

She laughs, as much as she'd like it, she could never see her life outside the Corps. "Dad, you know..."

"Not pressuring you, but have some fun, meet new people!"

"I have friends, I have you all. It's good enough."

"I always thought like that when I was your age. But if I hadn't gone out of my bounds, do you think I would've met your mother?" 

Speaking of which, she made a reminder to herself to visit her mother.

She rolls her eyes, chuckling at the thought of her dad asking her to start dating. "Yeah, you're right. Maybe after this expedition, I'll think about it."

They share a laugh before Victor looks at her seriously, "About the expedition," She turns to him, her smile starting to fade. "Do you think you can handle it?"

She sighs, staring at the wall which was about a mile away, "I don't know, I've been to a few expeditions now, but I could never get used to it. I will always feel scared." The soft breeze was lifting her hair up as she tries to hold on to it. "But thinking about everyone and everything I've left here is what keeps me going."

" _Why_ , don't you two look sentimental?" Pierre shouts as he and Camille approach the two. 

(Y/N) grabs a pebble beside her and throws it at him. "What about it?"

"Listen, we've got something to tell you. I'm pretty sure you're the only who hasn't heard."

She turns to her dad who was just grinning. "Did you guys set me up with someone _again_?" 

"We could've done that, but no." Pierre places a hand on Camille's stomach and she giggles. "We're expecting!"

She stands up and hugs the two, "I'm so happy for you!" 

Camille breaks from the hug and holds (Y/N)'s hand. "Aww, thank you. We've been meaning write you about it last week, but we felt it was better to tell you personally." 

"I guess you'll have another kid to babysit now." Victor fixes the wrinkles in his pants, clearly he was the happiest when he heard the news. Grandchildren are gems.

"I know, I'm so excited! How far are you along?"

"Almost three months."

(Y/N) squats in front of Camille and rubs her stomach as well. "Auntie can't wait to meet you, little one."

* * *

"Can't stay too long, Margot's gonna hate us." Camille puts on her shoes and hangs her small bag on one shoulder. Victor insisted that they stay for dinner, but the two promised their daughter to be home before nighttime. "Don't worry, we'll be visiting again some time soon."

Camille pulls Victor and (Y/N) for a hug before getting inside the carriage that was waiting outside. "Be safe out there, I might set you up on a date with this guy I know soon."

"Ugh, stop. You should be the one to take care of yourself. Besides, I'm happy with being a babysitter."

"Protect yourself out there, ugly." It was Pierre's turn to hug her, and it was really tight. "You're still my _baby_ sister after all."

"Yeah, whatever. _Thank you_."

The two went ahead after waving goodbye. (Y/N) really did need this break. It was nice to sit down without any officer or squad leader calling out. 

The dinner was the best one she's had in a while, her dad was cooking food she couldn't normally eat at the headquarters. It was fun to hear her dad tell her stories about stupid and outrageous reasons why his patients would call in for appointments.

After cleaning up, (Y/N) excused herself to get to bed early, it's been a long day. All she wants now is to jump in her bed and sink in it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kind of a short chapter, but did my best to make it sweet <3 Thank you all for reading!


	4. Premonition

_"I'll take care of this one," she tells Hannah and Lia as she shoots a red signal flare to the sky. Because of the rain and fog, it was hard to see through their way. And they didn't see that a titan was trailing on them. They both give her a nod and moved forward._

_She hooks her gear to a nearby branch and bounced back to slice the titan's nape, sending it to the ground. She wasted no time and leaped back on her horse. The fog was getting thicker and thicker as she went further._

_Shit, she can't lose her squad. They couldn't have been that far away, if she killed that titan as fast as she could. She calls for Lia and Hannah, but with the rainfall crashing hard on the ground, it was almost impossible to hear everything else._

_Except for that loud shot._

_Looking up, she was even more scared that it was a black flare, just few meters away from her. She can't find the rest of her squad – she literally can't see anyone else, and now an abnormal might just be crushing her to death._

_Finally, the fog was clearing up, but bodies were everywhere. She couldn't tell which ones were whose, until she found Hannah and Lia. Everything looked like hell. Tears were brimming her eyes as she tried to cover her mouth._

_Anger and fear, that's all she felt. With every step the titan took, she gripped her blades even tighter. Then it stopped._

_She knows she'll die there. Might as well savor it._

_Leaping in front of it, she aimed for it's glowing eyes._

She got up all sweaty, with tears all over her face and was visibly shaking. Grabbing her pad and pen, she quickly wrote the details on it.

> _29th of July, 844_
> 
> _Expedition, rain and fog. Hannah, Lia, everyone._
> 
> _I'm sor-_

It felt too real. If only she was like everyone else, it'd be so much easier to forget that nightmare and move on. But it obviously wasn't just any scary dream, it was her future. Tears fell onto her paper, smudging most of her writing. Her sobbing was loud enough that her dad came in rushing from downstairs. This has not happened to her in years, but he knows something's up.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?" Drying her cheeks, he glances at the pad, and was scared as she was.

"I couldn't... s-save them." Victor was trying his best to stop her from hurting herself by embracing her tighter. She kept on repeat the same words until she ran out of breath, the sudden burst of emotions left her lightheaded, almost about to faint.

Victor couldn't help but sigh, still looking for the right words to say. 

The skies were gray, just like how she felt. She didn't fear her death more than the death of her friends. Apart from her family, Hannah and Lia were the only ones she could count on. _Through thick and thin_.

"I'm sorry, (Y/N). If only I knew what it was like to be seeing all these horrible things, I might be able to understand how you feel right now." He felt disappointed in himself, he didn't want to cheer her up with false hopes, but he didn't her to blame herself for the things that were beyond her control.

"I honestly don't know either, after all these years that my mind stayed silent, _it came back_. It came back on a time when I feel my happiest. I was so excited to see how fun it's going to be in the future, but now, I'm scared." 

"How did you know that this one's one of those dreams?"

"I... I had one that came true few days ago."

"But what if this was just a nightmare? Don't get me wrong, but as much as I'd want you to be aware of what you see in these dreams, I hope you don't rely on them so much." Her dad was right. Maybe she wasn't exploring other possibilities because she has her head wrapped around all these premonitions. "Remember, you're a scout, and so are your friends. Trust that you'll use the best of your abilities to survive."

His words weren't something she'd expect from him, but it was what she needed. She embraced him for a good minute before saying a word. "Thank you, Dad. You don't have to understand these things, you already care so much for me. I promise, I'll be strong." 

"I know you will, now let me go before I get too emotional." They both stifle a laugh, letting go of the hug. "I've got patients to pay a visit today, what are your plans?"

"I'm visiting mom, I haven't gone there in such a long time."

He smiles, walks towards the door, "Before you go, eat. _A lot_. You're losing weight."

"I told you, I'm not! You just need new glasses."

* * *

"Hey, Mom. Long time no see." Her mother's headstone looked like it was just cleaned recently, either Victor or Pierre must've visited. But she still grabbed a piece of cloth from her bag and dusted off the new dirt that stuck on it. 

"I got you your favorite flowers. It's quite hard to find peonies now that it's late July, but I managed." The light pink flowers were carefully placed at the center, her mom would've loved how pretty they look, especially that they were in her favorite color.

She runs her fingers on the letters etched on the stone. _Amelia_. It still remains the prettiest name she's ever heard, it was as pretty as her mother, of course. "I just got home yesterday from the headquarters, and I'll be back tomorrow. _You know_ , it's all very exhausting, but I couldn't imagine myself doing work other than being part of the Survey Corps." 

"Also, I'm having weird ass dreams again, like the one's that become real? Yeah, those ones." Her smile was starting to fade once more, "I don't know what to do, really. It's not like I'm anticipating for the worst to come, but I don't wanna be careless either."

"You would've known what to tell me when something like this happens, but I'm really grateful for Dad, my worries were somehow lessened."

She sighs and shrugs, "I thought I could move on and live a good life until _you know_ , I get eaten by a titan or whatever. But when I get dreams about how I want to do something to prevent the worst from happening yet I couldn't, my guilt keeps on tearing me apart." She fights the tears brimming by forcing a small smile on her lips, "I promise you though, I'll be strong."

* * *

_"The only way that letter could stay hidden if it's close to him." The taller man leans back on the wooden pillar. Rubbing the stubble on his chin._

_A female voice sneers, but sure to keep her voice low as to not draw anybody else's attention. "Exactly, it's obviously not in his office when we searched it."_

_The man snaps his fingers as he got the idea. "It's with him. He's a smart guy, he knows that people like us would find ways to get that."_

_"I guess we'll have to get that letter during the expedition." Another voice emerges, he was just listening to the other two arguing about their plans the whole time._

_"How? Isn't he going to notice? And besides, we're in a different squad, he might always be a step ahead, or just watching us from behind."_

_"We've got no choice but to kill Erwin Smith, if that's what it takes." The three agree on the shorter man's statement. If there was anyone who could plot the whole plan neatly, it was him._

_"Isn't everyone else gonna notice? Especially that girl, (Y/N). She's pretty sharp, might be able to kill you if given the command. Remember when she threw you to the ground?"_

_"Might be. She's never killed someone her own kind. We'll have the upper hand, and I'm ready to attack anyone who gets in the way." He grins as he views his reflection on his sharp knife._

* * *

Commander Shadis plays with the rim of his cup and scoffs. "So, you think they'll execute their plan on the expedition?"

"Mhm, they're picking up. They're just as every bit of smart as us." Mike shrugs as he sips his tea, the cup looking so much smaller than it already is in his fingers.

"And _you_ , Erwin, your life's at risk here. If they could find a way through the formation, you might just be dead."

Erwin just nods, he's aware of what just might happen during the expedition. However, if there's anything this man is the best at doing, it's to _gamble_.

"How about moving (Y/L/N) to your squad, Erwin?" He shot up at the mention of her last name. "I trust you have strong officers in your squad, but if there's someone who has an idea on how to take him down, it's _her_."

"No," He disagrees, he didn't want any more scouts to be involved in this operation, let alone getting any of them hurt. "Isn't the very reason why we put those three in Flagon's squad other than them not being a direct threat to me, is so she could watch them?"

Mike shakes his head in disagreement. "But I don't think she sees them the same way we do – _enemies_."

"It doesn't matter, she'll always keep an eye on them because they are new recruits, she knows that Levi might just be as strong as her and that she couldn't put such a talent to waste." Flagon butts in, finishing the last of his tea that has gone lukewarm through their conversation. 

"No one else should know about this operation as much as possible. If this plan works our way, we might just be able to gain the group's trust. People wouldn't have to know about their past line of work and they'll be able to build a brand new reputation for the Survey Corps and themselves, especially Levi."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello:))) This one's pretty short, but I think I got the details in though :)) Thanks for the kudos and hits!!!


	5. Cursed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: mention of blood, shooting

_Year 827_

"Breakfast is ready, come down!" Amelia calls from the kitchen as she sets the table. Pierre being his usual self, nudges (Y/N) to the side as they run down the stairs. (Y/N) scratches her hair which got into worse knots afterwards. Fed up with him being the most obnoxious kid she's ever known, she could've pushed him, but she was obviously so much smaller than Pierre. 

The whole kitchen smelled of omelettes fresh off the pan, warm milk, Victor's strong coffee, and peonies that sat on a vase at the center of the table. Amelia made the most of the flowers' blooming season and bought a lot whenever she can. She wasn't very good at tending to a flower bed herself.

Pierre gobbled up all the food on his plate as soon as he plops down his chair. Victor berates him as he might get hiccups if he wasn't careful, but the bigger kid wasn't one to listen, he was just excited to go to school and have fun. (Y/N) always felt jealous that she couldn't go to the big kids' school just yet, but Amelia made sure to teach her while she was at home. (Y/N) surely was smart for a kid her age.

Victor always drops Pierre off at school before going to work while the two are left at home. As Amelia was all over the house doing chores, (Y/N) was sat at the table with a story book. The one she kept reading was about a woman who was cursed to see the future through her dreams, however, (Y/N) never thought of it as a curse and wanted to have the same powers as she did. In the book, it was said that the curse was passed on to the women in that bloodline.

Everywhere she went, (Y/N) always had that book with her, flipping through the pages whenever she felt bored. As Amelia hung their clothes to dry outside, (Y/N) sat on the grass and remembered the dream she had that morning.

"Mommy?"

"Yes, dear?" She continues to hang the clothes and clipping them so that the wind couldn't blow them away.

"Is it _really_ possible for dreams to become real?"

She stops, turns around and gives her a smile, "Why'd you ask me that?" And returns to her work. 

"I was just wondering, I had a dream that Pierre will come home with a scraped knee."

"Hm, let's not hope it'll come true, you know how squeamish he could be when he gets a wound."

Of course Amelia knew a lot about it, after all, the book (Y/N) held was the history of their family. She knew that the curse will pass down to the little girl the same way it did for her and the other women in the past. Why their ancestor was cursed in the first place was unknown even by the one who wrote the book, but they came to accept it as their fate – _as they should_.

However, it didn't seem like it was time to tell her about it just yet. Maybe when her dreams start coming true, she would. But for now, she wanted her daughter to enjoy not having to rely and be too conscious of her dreams.

The hours came by, the two really didn't think much about the conversation they had earlier. Amelia was in the kitchen preparing their dinner, (Y/N) tended to be helpful by cleaning up the vegetable peelings after her mother. It wasn't long till they heard the door open and a child crying.

 _"Come on, Pierre. If you hadn't been such a naughty kid."_ The familiar voice of her father scolded Pierre who appeared to have a bandage on his knee. Amelia rushed to the living room and was even more shocked than she was supposed to be. She kneels down to dry Pierre's tears and comfort him.

"I told you, Mommy. _My dream_ was real."

Amelia gives Victor a look telling him that they should talk about it later. "It's alright now, Pierre. I cooked your favorite stew, you wouldn't want it to go to waste, would you?"

* * *

_Year 831_

They came to terms with it, _as they should_. They explained to (Y/N) that most of her dreams would actually come true. Fortunately, she never dreamt about anyone getting hurt after the first. Most of them were just about the weather, what they'd eat for dinner, or the homework Pierre might have forgotten to make. She never tried changing anything to the details in her dreams, believing that everything is supposed to happen that way. She has never thought of it as a curse.

One day, she wakes up shaken and scared. A single tear falls down her face. 

_Mom._

She walks down the hallway of her home when Amelia called for breakfast. It was another school day, the dream made her hesitate whether she'd go or not. She had to come up with some sort of lie to have her stay at home, her instincts wished for her to stay by her mother's side.

"You seem a little bit out of the weather." Amelia passes her a bowl of oatmeal with fruits across the table. This gave her the opportunity to lie, telling her mother that she didn't feel well enough to go to school.

"I see, get some rest after eating then."

"Can I stay in the living room?"

"Sure, I'd have to check on you from time to time."

 _'That was easy,'_ she thought to herself, maybe then, she'd be able to watch whatever her mother will be doing. She felt relieved that there was nothing out of the ordinary that happened. Amelia was all over the house, as usual, she then took a break and read a book off the shelf.

"Oh, I almost forgot," She closes her book and goes upstairs to grab something. (Y/N) started to feel uneasy once more. "Sweetie? You think you'd be okay here if I went to the market? I promise I won't be long."

" _What?_ What for?!"

"I wanted to cook meat for dinner, and I realized we don't have any left."

"Can I come with you then? Please? I'm scared."

Amelia instantly knew something was off, but she decided against asking her what exactly she dreamt about. "Go get changed, I suppose you'd need some fresh air as well."

After buying all the things they needed, and a couple slices of pie later, the two decided to walk home. The wind started to grow colder now that it late September. Beautiful orange and brown leaves line the path as they pass. 

Amelia looks up to see the setting sun behind the trees, the scene looking familiar.

"Sweetie?"

"Yes, Mom?"

"Always remember that I love you, okay?"

She cringes at her mother's sudden affection, "Ew, why would you say that?"

"I just feel like it, is it wrong that I tell my _little baby_ that?" Amelia smiles at her and back at the beautiful sunset.

"No, you're just not normally like this. But I love-"

A loud bang was heard. Everyone else started to panic and run. (Y/N) tugged Amelia by her blouse as she remembered. _Oh no._

The next thing she knew was that Amelia dropped to the ground on the small pile of leaves with blood coming out of her chest. 

"Mom!" She tried stopping the bleeding with her tiny hands as she called for help. Everyone and everything around her was in total chaos. Some woman managed to call a Garrison officer in, but they failed to catch whoever fired the gun.

"Mom! Hold it in, we're gonna get that bullet out of you, okay?" Amelia holds (Y/N)'s bloody hands and takes them off her chest. "I-I'm sorry, Mom. I should've told you sooner, maybe... maybe I could've _stopped_ this from happening."

"No... this... isn't your fault... I knew this... was bound... to happen." She felt her mother's grip loosening on her hands, her breathing started to slow down.

"Mom, please! Stay with me, help will come soon!"

"I love you... so much, sweetie. Tell dad and Pierre I love them too... okay?"

"But Mom! Please..."

She lets go, her eyes shut for the last time. That single, yet fatal shot made her lose so much blood that it scattered on the dead leaves. Help did come, but it was all too late. 

The sun has set. There were things that couldn't be brought to life again, like the fallen leaves.

And now she understood why this was called a curse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the tragic ending of this short chapter. I wrote this to give a little insight on how the character got the dreams, why she reacted that way when she got her dreams back, and how her mother passed. Hope it helped :)))


	6. Trost

"Sure you have everything you need?" Victor hands (Y/N) her bag as she heads out the door in full uniform. She told him she needed to be back early because she had to clean up her stuff back in the headquarters.

"Remember what I told you," he puts both hands on her shoulders. "Trust your strength, and help whenever you can."

She gives him the warmest smile and nods. He chuckles and pats her head. "Don't skip meals." They give in for a last hug before she could leave. 

"I won't. Love you, Dad."

"You too, I'll see you soon!"

It wasn't until she walked a few steps further when her fear started to kick in once more. _What if she doesn't go back to the headquarters? Would her not being there in the first place change everything?_

 _No, it is bound to happen._ And she keeps walking. But even so, she still wants to believe she'll see her dad, bicker with Pierre, have fun with Margot, meet Camille and the new baby, and enjoy so much more with her friends soon. They'll just have to get through this alive.

She arrives at the main street. They live at the furthest part of Trost, the edge close to Wall Maria's interior. It might as well take her half the day and a new pair of legs if she'll walk through their home to the headquarters which was in the inner part of Wall Rose. As she was about to cross the street and make her way to ride a ferry, a familiar carriage stops in front of her and she wonders. The door opens to someone with the bluest set of eyes she's seen.

"Good morning, (Y/L/N)."

 _Shit._ Of all the times, it had to be now when she looked exasperated of how far she has to go yet. She drops her bag and salutes.

"Are you sick? You look very red." _Fucking shit, not now._

"Oh no, Captain! I just really get red easily because of the sun." Captain Erwin smiles, at this point, her mind was panicking and her thoughts were just all over the place. Anyone who'd be coming face to face with him would've felt the same. "Wh-what brings you here, Captain?"

"I'm supposed to have some important meeting with someone before I head to the headquarters, and then I saw _you_." Erwin tried to sound as professional as possible while (Y/N) looked like a giddy teenager staring at a gorgeous man. She couldn't help it, he really is gorgeous after all. "Would you like to join me? After all, we're still heading the same place. Unless you had somewhere else to go first?"

"Thank you, Captain, but I can take the ferry and I just might disrupt your schedule."

"Come on, _I insist_. And besides, I doubt the ferry's leaving anytime soon, it's still so early."

"Well," she couldn't just pass on a free ride. Plus, it's so much better than having to wait for who knows how long to get on a boat. "I guess I should." He asks her to pass her bag first then helped her up with one hand. His hand felt rougher and colder compared to hers which were delicate and warm. 

She sits beside him with enough distance, he waited her to settle well before he told the coachman to move along. She mouths a small thank you in which he replies with a nod.

Erwin wasn't good with starting conversations, at least those that didn't have anything to do with the Corps or killing titans. "So, do you... live around here?" His voice a bit too low for her to hear, _how is he even faltering those simple words?_

"Hm?"

"Sorry, do you live around here?"

"Yes, I do. _Not to brag_ , but I think I know this place by heart." They didn't bother looking at each other and just focused on viewing the streets they passed by. There were a fair amount of people walking down the streets, it felt like it was going to be a nice Saturday.

"Really? I've lived here all my life, but I never got to explore so much." He was aware of how boring his life is, he is after all always out and about places outside the walls that he wasn't able to enjoy a lot inside the district.

She turns to him who was just fascinated with his view. "You really should explore it here! I might be able to join you, if you'd like, Captain."

He stares right back at her (E/C) eyes with a small grin, "That does sound like a plan."

* * *

The carriage stopped in front of a big building after almost an hour of running, across it was a park lined with stalls of food and merchandise, children were out and about in the sun as well.

"I should be back in an hour, I guess. Would you be waiting here or inside the building?" Erwin turns to her as he opens the door. Looking back to the park, she thought of something else.

"May I wander around, Captain? My brother's family lives around here and I was hoping I'd see my niece somewhere."

"That sounds better, I'll meet you by that fountain then." She nods. Erwin heads out first and again offers her a hand. It was only then that she noticed his right hand was wrapped in medical bandage, _strange_. She carefully held him by the fingers to avoid touching the covered palm and got down.

They went off to separate paths right after. She heads for the park and looking around, hoping Margot was out to play. Their house was only a few streets down, and if she didn't find Margot, she'll go for a quick visit there. Much to her surprise, Margot was walking carelessly while reading a book along with two boys who were bickering at each other.

"Margot!" She calls out, her niece was quick to recognize her voice and closes her book to look around. "Right here!"

She runs to (Y/N) at full speed and was met by a warm embrace. "Auntie! Why are you here? I thought you were at Grandpa's house."

(Y/N) kisses her cheek and puts her back to her feet. "I'm actually going back to the headquarters, luckily we got to make a stop here." Just then, Margot's friends came running and saluted to (Y/N). One kid had light, pinkish hair while the other had black hair and noticeable freckles on his cheeks. She salutes back, they looked really serious anyway.

"Good day, _scouts_. Out for a nice walk in the park?"

" _Uhm_ , we- we're not real scouts, officer." The freckled boy stutters as they both removed their fists from their chests. 

She squats down to their level and gave them a warm smile. "Do you want to be?" The two nod, the way they both do everything synchronized made her chuckle and ruffled their hair. "What are your names?"

"Jean Kirstein, miss!" The pink haired boy was quick to respond, even stood straight when he did.

"I'm Marco Bott, miss." 

Margot puts her hands on her hips and scoffs, " _Hmp_ , when you two will become soldiers, I'm not gonna stick around."

"Suit yourself, Marco and I will be part of the Military Police and you won't be able to go to Wall Sina with us." 

"Of course, I won't. I'm gonna be in the Survey Corps _just like you_ , Auntie!" (Y/N) was kind of shocked at the thought of her niece wanting to be like her. "If I won't like studying anymore, I might as well go out of the walls, and protect people!"

" _Woah_ , you are part of the Survey Corps?" Jean looked in awe, he must've not noticed the badge on her coat, so she showed it. "So you _have_ seen titans then?"

"Yes, I have. So tell me, why do you want to be part of the Military Police?"

" _Huh_ , to protect the King of course! And I heard everything is fancier inside Wall Sina."

Margot rolls her eyes, "Protect from _what_ exactly? Isn't it more important to help the people that are at bigger risk of getting titan attacks? Like the people in districts?" Now (Y/N) gets why they say Margot is so much like her. "After all, Mitras is in the innermost part."

She almost wanted to commend her niece, but felt that it would be biased and might change the two boys' minds.

"But have it your way, I don't even think you're _strong enough_ to deal with titans." Margot adds.

Marco, the most silent one among the bunch, opens his mouth to speak. "Were you ever scared of titans, miss?"

"Of course, I can't just act super brave when I'm surrounded by enemies five times as tall as I am."

"So, does that mean you're weak?"

"I'd like to think I am." She smiles, "It's because I understand how the weak feel, and that's important so that I'll be able to protect them the way they want to be protected."

Marco seemed satisfied with her answer, it was something he'd always remember from then on.

* * *

The meeting ended earlier than expected, and Erwin felt satisfied with the outcome of it. He walks straight out of the building after he bids everyone else farewell. He crosses the road and went to their meeting place. As he walks towards the statue at the center of the park, he sees (Y/N) chatting to three kids who were enjoying corn on the cobs. She seems to be telling a story judging by how their expressions looked when she spoke. 

He decides to stop a few meters away, not wanting to interrupt their conversation. It was nice to see that she is indeed very friendly with everyone, it looked _cute_ even, he admits. 

He saw himself just admiring her, the way she had actions with her words, the way she giggled, the way her face and her smile looked brighter under the sun. _Stop it, Erwin. You absolutely look stupid. She's a scout just like you, that's all._

It wasn't long till she hugged the little girl tightly and patted the two boys' heads before waving goodbye. It was only when they were far enough away that he approached her and sat beside.

"You seem to be having fun."

"I just saw my niece and met her two friends. They were extremely adorable, that's why I bought them some snack." _She was more adorable than they were._ "They were asking me what it's like in the training corps, they said they wanted to become soldiers as well." 

Just then, they heard a stomach rumble quite loudly. He didn't even realize it was already noon time.

"Do you wanna eat lunch together?" He asks, he noticed that she was turning red once more, _she must be really sensitive to the sun._ He uses one hand to cover her face from above, it didn't even come to his mind that he was doing it, _weird reflex_. 

"Are you ahead of your schedule, Captain?"

"Fortunately, I am. The meeting was brief as everyone else has got places to be. Lucky for _us_ , _we_ might be able to have a little walk around here before _we'd_ return to the headquarters – if you're okay with that."

"I'd love to!" She smiles, stands up and grabs him by the hand. He winces, loud enough to hear her gasp. She accidentally touched his wound when she held his hand.

"Oh my gosh, I am so sorry, Captain." She traces the bandage softly and flips his hand over to see his palm. "Where did you get this? If you don't mind telling."

"I almost dropped a knife while I was cooking, and grabbed the wrong end." He lies, his first meeting with Levi wasn't exactly the most pleasant, and something she shouldn't know. "But it's alright, I was just a bit surprised."

She led him to a stall that was selling full meals. Potatoes with gravy and meat, stews, and other kinds of food that were extremely mouthwatering. They bought their lunch and ate in the long table where people get to eat food from various stalls. It was like an outdoor food court, and the atmosphere was just _amazing_.

After a hearty meal, the two went around the shops, looking for whatever catches their eye. They casually get stares from other people most likely because of their uniforms or the fact that one of the best scouts of mankind was just casually walking down the street. 

Erwin didn't mind much, he was already used to the attention, and besides, his attention was on the girl that pointing at different things and landmarks, and explaining to him how significant they were to Trost.

About half an hour later, they were both back in the carriage with a box of apple strudels that they shared. 

"Thank you, I've never had fun like this before."

She didn't know if she was going to accept the gratitude, after all, he was the one who suggested it.

"I'm glad you did, Captain." His blue eyes met her (E/C) ones once more. She never expected to see someone as tough as him would be such a gentle person when he's not doing anything work related. It was a refreshing side, a _new perspective_. "Thank you too, this really helped me take my mind off of things."

"I hope it did, whatever it is that you're thinking about."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to write this cute chapter because I wanted to show awkward/softie Erwin <333 
> 
> I also included a special participation of young Jean and Marco (if you spotted the foreshadowing, i love you) 
> 
> Anddd I suggest you guys listen to Love On The Weekend by John Mayer, I kinda got the inspiration for this chapter from the song..
> 
> Thank you all so much for the kudos, hits, and for reading! :>


	7. Trapped

"I just had a dream about kissing some guy." (Y/N), Hannah, and Lia sat on their usual spot at the mess hall. She runs a hand through the top of her hair and gives "It's _so weird._ "

Hannah snickers, "Oh come on, it's not weird. The chances of you dating someone just rose significantly a few days ago when Captain Erwin took you on a date."

"I told you, that wasn't a date. He just... he just wanted to see the place, that's all." (Y/N) says as she waves around her bread while trying to make a point. 

"But when you think about it, he's really immersed himself in his work. Just how many times has he broken away from his schedule to have a good time with someone? I doubt it's a lot." Hannah notices that Lia barely touched her food and decided to steal some of it, she didn't even care.

Lia shrugs, "You know, Hannah has a point. Maybe he does actually fancy you if he'd do something out of the ordinary."

"Who knows?" Hannah inquires with a full mouth, "Anyway, do you remember how they looked like?" 

Levi and his friends sat by the window and just watching the view outside as they went through their food. Like the usual, Isabel and Furlan were chatting as Levi listened there and made no response. 

She gave him a glance, his features so much more visible in the bright light of the sun. His eyes were dull, yet extremely daunting. Every time she took a look at him, she'll always remember those eyes; she's sure she's seen them before — even before they came, but she couldn't recall when exactly.

Without taking her eyes off of him, she goes back to the question, "I-i don't remember, exactly. Just that they were wearing something on their collar."

"Maybe a bolo?" The other two gave high fives to each other while snickering at (Y/N). Hannah goes on to drink from her mug and spits it back out. "Speaking of the _devil_..."

Erwin walks in along with the other squad leaders. Hannah's eyes grew wide when she saw them coming their way, not knowing what to do, she looks down to her plate and pretended to finish what was left. Because (Y/N) sat across her, she didn't know what to expect.

"Good morning," The blond greets everyone, smiling when their glances met. He left as soon as he came and sat a few tables away, and sat down where they could actually see each other's faces. Captain Flagon walks behind and stops in front of their table as well. 

"Mornin' you three," and gives them a sarcastic smile. "You'll be on stock work today with those three." He uses his head to point towards Levi and his friends. "Don't worry, y'all can just sit by the corner. I'm sure they'll get your instructions."

(Y/N) snaps back jokingly, "That's so mean, we got cramps a lot when we were still new here."

"Whatever, just tell them what to do." He begins to step forward and pauses, "And also, the commander wants the stock room _spotless_."

The three started mentally berating themselves for not leaving soon as they finished eating. Now they're going to spend the whole day dusting off such a huge room.

"I'm curious," Lia turns her attention at the captain making his way to his co-leaders, "Why is he so keen on you sticking close to Levi? It's not like they need so much attention, considering they're extremely skillful."

(Y/N) looks to Levi once more, she's sure he was glaring at Erwin's direction for who knows what reason. She didn't think too much about it and stood up to leave the room, but went to the black haired guy's table.

She waves them all hello and gave and apologetic smile. "Good morning, sorry to interrupt you this early." Levi sighed in exasperation when she started talking. Isabel was kind enough to tell them it's alright and asked what she was there for.

Lia uses a thumb to point to the leaders' table's direction. "Captain has _us_ on stock work today, and that includes cleaning that huge ass stock room."

"What a _great_ way to start the day," Levi plays with the spoon on his plate. "By _us_ , do you mean just us three doing all the work while you guys sit somewhere?"

(Y/N) laughs off the sarcastic remark, "Might be, but if y'all promise not to ditch, we'll help." 

" _You're_ one to talk," Furlan exclaims turns to the other guy with a proud look on his face. "Levi wouldn't dare leave a place until he's sure every inch is cleaned."

" _Hm_ , I have an idea." She clicks her tongue. "Whoever cleans the best will get drinks after the expedition." Emphasizing her words, " _All on me._ "

The three looked to each other and thought it was fair. "Deal."

"Okay then, we'll meet outside the sleeping quarters in an hour."

* * *

With a cloth over his head and another covering the lower half of his face, Levi was ready to get cleaning. Ironically with his line of work, the thing he hated the most was getting dirty. He leaned against the wall whilst crossing his arms and tapping a finger. 

Isabel and Furlan on the other hand, were arguing about nonsense like the usual. When they'd ask for Levi's opinion about the matter, he just says whatever.

Out of the corner of his eye, he notices three girls walking towards them in a similar get up. The (H/C) one however, opted for a black fitted long-sleeved shirt instead of her usual white polo. The other two — called _Hara and Luna_ or whatever their names were; brought in a bunch of brooms and feather dusters. 

" _Why_ , don't you look less threatening with your outfit right now," She says, he knew that she obviously was talking to her, making his head move to her direction. "I might almost think that it's _cute_ on you."

He gives her the most smug look as he straightens his posture, "You'll think otherwise later on." He starts walking and his friends followed. 

She walks past him and goes ahead, "We'll see about that."

They reach the stock room's big doors and altogether opened them as they were just as heavy. The large room was filled with wooden crates full of gears, blades, possibly some uniforms, and other important stuff the scouts would need. The crates were either strewn across the floor or placed in the big shelves. There wasn't enough light from the sun to reach through the whole place, good thing there were torches that they could light up.

Hannah begins tapping a finger onto a clipboard she held, "Before we'd get to cleaning though, we'd have to check if the items are complete."

Lia's eyes widen and turns to the whole place, " _All_ of it?"

"Oh no, I was told that only these crates on the floor are the ones that haven't been double checked." Hannah smiles. "It shouldn't take long."

"Let's get going," Isabel yawns and stretches her arms, "I just really wanna sleep after this."

Hannah looks back to the list on the clipboard, "There should be twenty crates of blades."

Furlan checks each one and looks back to them with an exhausted sigh, "None of these have labels though, should we open them up one by one?"

She shrugs, "We don't have a choice."

(Y/N) grabs a crowbar just lying around the corner and starts opening them one by one. There were just about sixty crates and she was only a quarter through them. While the others decided on dusting the shelves and walls, Levi rubbed his fingers on one window frame and was disappointed with how dusty it was. He grabs a feather duster and instantly cleans it with a few swipes.

Her hands felt weaker as she went through more of the boxes, eventually starting to sweat after exerting force. She looks back to Levi who was pushing the window open so that the dust could get out.

" _Uhm, hello?_ Any helping hand there?" She says as she pushes another one open tiresomely. 

"I thought we were going separate ways," He says without looking back to her. "And besides, _I'm busy_."

" _Ugh_ , fine then." Regretting she ever asked for help, she goes back to opening more. By this time, she was almost at the thirtieth when she felt a hand touch hers and grabbing the crowbar.

"Should've used your feet as well." Levi pops one open effortlessly. "You have to use most of your weight or else your hands would be numb without having opened it all yet."

She sits on the floor and wipes the sweat off her face. "I'll take note of that, thanks." Her hands were indeed numbed and they look very red. Even without doing anything, her fingers started to shake. 

"Don't thank me, it's just common sense." 

She laughs lightheartedly. The soft chuckle he heard made him pause for a moment. "Sorry, I didn't use my head there, did I?"

He smiles, but he doesn't look back at her so she wouldn't see. "You said it, I didn't."

"I really hate you, you know."

"Can't say I'm surprised." Levi was almost finished with all the boxes, but decides to take a small rest. He uses the bar as some sort of cane to lean on. "But the fact that you'd still talk to me does."

She gives him a confused look, "Why not?"

"If you hate me so much, why waste your spit trying to talk to me and eventually get into an argument?" He was right, every time they come across each other, they both always had something to oppose the other.

"It's just my first impression of you though," Giving him another smile, she approaches him and takes the crowbar from him. "I'm doing this to get to know you more — as a part of my responsibility."

"And _what_ responsibility would that be?"

"Keeping you safe," She now uses a foot to push the crate's lid up easily. "And building your trust."

Levi was quick to roll his eyes at the _cringy_ remark, "Don't be _pretentious_."

"I'm not, it's just that _everything_ works better when you know how to trust someone."

" _Ugh_ , knock yourself out." He shrugs, "You'll find yourself seeing me the same way as you do now."

But her persistence seems to tell him otherwise, the look in her face says she'll prove him wrong. "I won't."

They both finished opening the rest and told Hannah that the stocks were complete. The fact that they unironically helped each other whilst arguing seems to make everyone else feel different about the two.

"Hey, why don't you two get these uniform stocks in that room over there?" Hannah points to the farthest point of the room which had a small door behind the tall shelves. Each of them carefully carried a crate to the place. Contrary to what happened earlier, the small trip there was quiet. Levi did say it was such a waste of energy.

She fell behind his fast pace, amazed at how he could keep his posture even while carrying something heavy. This made her straighten her own back and ended up hearing small cracks. As they neared the small entrance, she decides to put the crate on the floor for a few seconds. He stopped as well, but didn't put his load on the floor like she did. 

"Are you coming or what?" He says, taking a step forward and opening the door with one hand. Just then, (Y/N) felt something shake.

"Levi, get down!" and _BANG!_

The huge shelf toppled over and the crates on it fell onto the floor. She finds herself on top of him, cling to the sides of his shirt. Everything was dark, the only thing he could feel is her breathing on his face. 

"Are you... hurt?" Was the first thing she said. 

"No, are _you_ hurt?" 

She falls to his side, trying to sit down by pushing herself up with her feet, she felt a sharp pain shooting on her left leg. She winces. "I think... I pulled a muscle when I ran there, but hey, we're safe. That was close."

"But now we're trapped here. I can't even see shit." Luckily, they were both able to kick the door close when the boxes started falling. Those would've gotten inside the small room and fell on top of them.

 _"(Y/N)! Levi! Can you hear me?!"_ Lia screams from the other side, giving them slight relief.

"We're here!" 

_"Thank goodness! But we can't get through the pile! We'll call for help so you two should stay still, and don't panic!"_ Her voice started getting panicky.

It went silent again after. The two tried to stay still in the small space, but it felt sore after some time — making the pain in (Y/N)'s leg worse. The two weren't saying anything either, not knowing how to react to the situation.

The minutes went by and it felt like hours. It was only then that Levi felt her shaking. 

"Hey, what's wrong with you?"

"I- I'm just not comfortable with being in the dark." She scooches closer to him, accidentally finding his left hand under hers. 

He holds it, and rubs it softly. It did help soothe her anxiety a bit, but she was still scared. Just as she was about to be calm, something moved on her left side, possibly a rat, but it was enough to make her shriek. 

He takes his hand off of hers, and instead wraps his left arm on her. She didn't know what to feel with his gestures, so she sat there in silence.

"Don't think about _this_ too hard," He refers to his gestures in a very defensive tone. "You do want to build my trust, don't you?" It felt like he could read her thoughts.

" _Sure_ , I understand." She smiles with her cheeks flushing red, this is the only thing that's good about the dark. "Thank you, Levi."

* * *

"Good thing it was just a strained muscle, it should be gone in a few days." The medic who examined her leg tells her. 

It has been about an hour since they got out of the room, it took a lot of scouts to remove the pile. Even the squad leaders helped out, Erwin was even the one who got the two out of there. When he heard about the incident, he practically bolted to the scene and remove as much from the pile as possible.

The six of them sat outside as the squad leaders examined and argued inside the stock room. They already ruled it out as the shelf's instability, that's why it confused them why they were still there. 

"We should bring you some food here. Would that be okay if we left a while?" Isabel suggests, they was just as hungry themselves.

"That would be great, thanks." And with that, the other four left to get food from the mess hall. She looks back to Levi who was deep in his thoughts. He noticed her stare and shared it with her.

" _Sorry_ about your leg, you shouldn't have done that." The sincerity in his voice was surprising, even to himself.

"And have you get crushed? I would never." She shows him her injured leg, "Don't think too much about it, it'll heal soon."

"You don't really have anything to regret, do you?"

"As long as it's for the greater good, then _no_ , I don't think there's anything to regret."

It was already noon and the sun shone directly at them, it was only then that she realized that he does look good under the bright light — now that she was this close. But there was something that made her chuckle to herself.

"Is there something on my face?"

She pulls a handkerchief from her pocket and rubs it gently on the corner of his lip. Apparently some dust got stuck and left such an obvious stain on his face. She noticed there was more on his neck so she offered the cloth to him. He reluctantly accepts it.

"There's still some more on your neck, wipe them off before you get an itch."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello!! I'm really really sorry for the slow update on this chapter, I was really busy the past few days + I had writer's block and had to literally rewrite this chapter about five times. I'm glad this version turned out very great for me, I hope you've enjoyed it as well :>
> 
> Thank you so much for the 400+ hits and the kudos!! It means so much to me <333


	8. Day One

_Southern Shiganshina District_

With a deep breath, (Y/N) tightens her grip on her horse's reins. The day has come for the Survey Corps to go outside the walls and learn more about the titans. Even if she had survive numerous expeditions outside, she could never get used to it — especially now that she might've predicted a tragedy coming up. 

Flagon's squad is part of the rear guard; even if they typically don't have to deal with titans so much, she was still scared of what might happen to her friends. While she was upfront along with Captain Flagon and Sairam, Hannah and Lia were among those at the furthest back. They had to make sure that the recruits were surrounded in the center.

She looks back to them with a worried look, but when they waved happily and nodded at her with determination, it somehow put her in ease. As she was about to glance back in front, she catches gaze with Levi. She couldn't read his expression from his blank face and dull eyes, but gave him a reassuring smile.

Seeing the crowd at the side of the street seemingly put a lot of pressure on everyone. The people — especially taxpayers, know that another expedition would just cost them a fortune and numerous more lives. But knowing that the Survey Corps has given more and more information about humanity's biggest enemy, they still look forward to whatever they can bring when they get back. Despite fearing their disappointment, the children that were amazed with the scouts in their green coats with the Wings of Freedom still bring glimmer of hope to them.

Just then the gate starts to open. _Moment of truth._

 _"Today, we take another step forward! Show me what you have learned in training! Teach them the power of the human race!"_ Commander Shadis shouts from the top of his lungs, just then, she tries to remember her father's words.

_"Remember, you're a scout, and so are your friends. Trust that you'll use the best of your abilities to survive."_

The gate is fully opened, sending in a strong breeze from the outside. 

"All troops, _ADVANCE!_ "

The scouts move forward, the cheers from the crowd becoming more and more faint with every step they take.

On the wide field, everything was beautiful. Flocks of birds flew in the same direction as them. The green grass seemed to stretch for miles and miles. It was a heavenly sight worth dying for — yet amongst it's beauty, savagery was lurking. (Y/N) felt relaxed when she heard the recruits wowing over the view, glad to know they're not too afraid.

" _Hm_ , not bad." Levi says, but he was obviously just as amazed as everyone else was.

The three started to go faster and sped past Flagon, Sairam, and (Y/N). They must've been deep into their conversation that they didn't notice they were breaking the ranks. Sairam speeds up to them and scolds.

"Stop it! These titans aren't as easy to beat as you think. Just how many elites got eaten by them? _Countless._ Don't think you _punks_ from the _underground_ can stand a chance against them!"

Offended by the remark, Isabel was quick to counter and made Sairam even angrier. If there was someone recruits shouldn't just mess around, it was him. Even (Y/N) finds him too much sometimes. As Sairam was about to move closer to Isabel to teach her a lesson, Levi steps in between obviously telling the other guy that she was off limits.

"Knock it off, Sairam!" Flagon interrupts, "We have to get in formation, and the titans could be anywhere!"

"Now's not the time," Agreeing to what her Captain says, she points her arm forward signaling them to move along, " _Save your energy_ , I'll take care of these guys."

Flagon and Sairam move along, leaving her with the three.

"Sorry about whatever he said about you guys, he's just very focused." She sighs; she gets why they'd be mad at him and the other way around. "But he's right, being here outside is very different from training. Don't let that happen again."

Coming close to the edge of the forest, the vanguard has encountered with a 15-meter titan. Without any other choice, they enter the forest and killed it as quickly as possible. The rest of the scouts moved along to the supply point up until Flagon's squad encountered an even larger titan. He commands the rear guard to lead the titan back into the forest, yet it didn't seem to even notice them running towards it. It was only when the titan got out the forest that they realized it was an abnormal.

"You four! Stay close," Flagon tells (Y/N) so they try to steer far from the titan. "Everyone else, _FIGHT!_ "

The first attempt was a failure, the titan started to eat the three scouts who managed to hook their gears on it. It stopped there for a second, making everyone get as far away as they could — but it started again.

" _Shit_ , we've got no choice. Sairam, let's go!" Right when the captain ordered the other to attack it in whatever way they could, Levi, Isabel, and Furlan charged towards it. Flagon scolds (Y/N) for letting them go so easily.

"Does it _look_ like I could just hold them back?!" She shouts back with a defensive tone. "Trust them, Captain."

Much to the Captain's surprise, they were able to wound its legs severely; causing the titan to stumble from its run. Levi didn't waste any time and went ahead to cutting through its nape. 

_"Fuck yes!"_ She exclaims, feeling very proud of the three at that very moment. Now that it was clear ahead, they all stopped from running for a while. "That was beautiful!"

Erwin who saw everything was just as impressed as well, leaving a big smile on his face. He proved to them that in fact, they do have the potential — especially Levi.

* * *

"Damn, I could really use a vacation after this one." Hannah stretches her arms over her head, making a few joints pop. She proceeds to arch her back, it was very tense after all that horseback riding. "Say, you haven't sliced a nape or two today, have you, (Y/N)?"

Lia scoffs as she lays a blanket on the floor, "You know she was busy babysitting those three." Turning her head to Levi's direction. "I heard you earned some scolding from the Captain."

"Oh god, it's not like he wasn't amazed with what those three did." (Y/N) defends, "He had to see that, Sairam had to see that; those two just don't seem to see them as really talented people."

The other two laugh, Hannah chiding her even more, " _Huh_ , you still got some lousy punishment, didn't you? Let me guess, is it another round of arranging the books in his office?"

"No, it's even worse." Lia lets out the loudest cackle that everyone turned their heads to them for a split second. "Stable work."

Hannah was now finding it hard to breathe after all the laughs. " _Oh shit_ , now I feel bad." 

"Oh yeah?" She hits a small bag at Lia and then throws it to Hannah, " _Thank you very, very much!_ That's very sympathetic of you two."

The three couldn't contain their laughter for a few seconds before sighing in exhaustion. The atmosphere is now back to being serious.

"Hey, I know it's been bothering you for days on end." Immediately, (Y/N) knew what Lia was talking about. "But whether you're with us or not on the next days, we'll be safe."

Hannah approaches the two from the back and hugs them. "Bet you we will!" She then pulls out a letter from inside her jacket, "Besides, Thomas is still counting on us to make up for not coming to his birthday."

"Oh my god, I feel bad for little Tommy." Hannah's younger brother's handwriting scribbled their names in capital letters, expressing his disappointment. The other two already consider Thomas as their own younger brother as well — they've always loved the idea of a younger sibling.

"I'll spoil that kid for sure." (Y/N) says, thinking about all the possible gifts he could give him. The kid was always very sweet to them, but he often chides on his big sisters for not leaving the Corps. He prefers having them stay so they could go ride horses in the open field inside Wall Maria. 

"That's why we have to get through this! For Tommy!"

* * *

She twists and turns in the makeshift bed, she's been laying there for an hour, but her eyes refuse to get some shut eye. Hannah and Lia have been asleep for two hours now, with small snores only she could hear. 

Annoyed with her ruined body clock, she gets up to see everyone else sleeping, except for one empty spot across theirs. She couldn't see through the dark who slept beside the spot. With the moon being the only light, she carefully walks through the hallways of the ruined castle. 

She finally finds an open space where she can stay. She didn't notice that there was one scout watching over the place. "Hey, (Y/N)! Can't sleep?" A man waves to her direction with a smile on his face.

Shrugging, she goes to his place and watches the pretty view. "Yeah, you're on guard duty?"

"Yup," The man nods, "Say, can I ask you a favor?"

 _"I know, I know."_ She shoos him with her hand. "Take your time, I'll check over here. I think I won't be sleeping anytime soon."

He smiles even wider and pats her shoulder, "Thanks, _you're the best_." And disappears in the opposite direction.

She sits by the edge of the tower. The grass in the open field sway along with the wind. Small gray clouds passed by and covered the moon for a moment.

 _I wish the weather will be good tomorrow._ She hopes to herself. The real reason why she couldn't sleep was her overthinking — she hasn't had a good rest in a week or so and only relies on strong, dark, cups of coffee.

 _"I can't believe you'd just let anyone boss you around."_ Levi's voice which she has come to be familiar with, starts sneering once more.

She sighs, "What is it this time?"

He sits with some distance from her, only this time it was shorter than the first time they sat under the moonlight together. "I still don't know if you're just _pretending to be kind_ to everyone, or you're just _foolish_." 

She rolls her eyes at him and uses her hands to express conviction. "I've said it once and I'll say it again, I'm just trying to help." 

" _Huh_ , if you haven't known, that guy's been skipping his work all night and you're just the third scout he's made to watch over." He shakes his head in disagreement and disappointment. "Do you think they deserve your help?"

"Okay, fine. That time was my mistake." Defeated, she looks down to the ground, that's when she realized the tower was high; making her stay back a few inches away from the edge. "Do you ever just come around to lash out at me? If that is, you may leave."

"I thought we were _'building trust'_ here?" He finger quotes those two words. "Because you're not doing a very good job at that. I noticed that it's literally so easy for people to tell you what to do because you act too kind to them, you don't even have second thoughts on their _true intentions_."

She frowns, she didn't realize that she was indeed too kind until he brought it up. "Do you suppose I should doubt you the same way the others do?"

" _Exactly._ For such a short time that we've known each other, it bothers me that you're not even scared." 

The smile comes back to her face, it was a much better view than seeing her sad. "There is something about you that I won't doubt, that's why."

"And that is?" His dull eyes finally met her glimmering ones, it amazes him that no matter what words he throws at her, she remains unfazed.

"That somewhere inside you," She points a finger close to his chest, making him flinch thinking it would touch. "Lies a _softie_." 

Just as he was going to snap back, a small light passes through the sky in a split second. It was unlike anything he has seen before. " _What the hell_ was that?"

Her mouth opens wide to her excitement. "That was a shooting star! Don't tell me you haven't seen one?"

"I thought it was just my eyes playing with me." He says, embarrassed. Even though Levi has peeped through the night sky a few times when he was still in the underground, it was hard to see the stars, let alone falling ones. But he lied, she'd most likely wonder where someone who hasn't seen shooting stars would come from.

She crosses her fingers on both hands and closes her eyes. 

Looking at her with confusion, he inquires. "What are you doing?" 

"Making a wish." She places her hands back on her lap, smiling with hopefulness.

"Do they come true?"

She shrugs. "I don't know, but there's no harm in trying. Come on!"

He tries to wish as she waits there beside him. She seems to have forgotten the squabble they had moments ago when she sat there peacefully, watching the grass dance with the wind.

And in that moment he knew that there was _something_ about her he still can't quite put a finger on. Something different from the rest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think I love Levi and MC having moments under the moonlight after an argument now :>
> 
> Thank you so so much for continuing to read! The last time I checked there were still 400+ hits and now it's reached 600 <333


	9. As It Should

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TW: gruesome descriptions, blood, death

It's the second day of the expedition, everyone is one their horses, preparing for any signal to advance. (Y/N) stayed up all night, yet she didn't show any signs of being tired. If there was anything she felt, it was anxiety and the need to be cautious of everything. The skies are clear, just like what she hoped for; but she just can't be too sure.

Unlike the ranks they had yesterday, squads are split into smaller units for the long-distance formation. This made it harder for (Y/N) and her friends to check on each other as they were in separate units. While she was in the second row, fourth position, Hannah and Lia were two units behind. 

Under _favorable circumstances_ , their units wouldn't have to meet as much titans as the outer units would, they'd only have to relay messages to and from the commanding unit, and keep a steady pace along with their spare horses.

Sairam cautiously inches closer to her to tell her to keep her eyes on Levi, Isabel, and Furlan. " _Do not_ let any of them break ranks, do _you_ understand?" He emphasizes.

She gives him a silent yes before he goes back to his position. The way he said it felt strange to her. Making her watch over new recruits through their training and their first expedition was one thing, but being so adamant about her seeing their movements all the time was another. And that's when she remembers what Levi told her a couple of hours prior.

_"...you don't even have second thoughts on their true intentions."_

_"For such a short time that we've known each other, it bothers me that you're not even scared."_

What was there for her to be scared? Why was she made to look after them all the time in the first place? Was there something that everyone else knew that she didn't? 

She looks back to Levi, searching for answers in his eyes. 

The black haired guy shares her stare, he was just as puzzled as she was. But while she was wondering what could happen if she _failed_ to look after them, his own words echoed inside his mind.

_"She's never killed someone her own kind. We'll have the upper hand, and I'm ready to attack anyone who gets in the way."_

They keep moving forward, until Erwin sends a signal for the scouts to get into the formation. Flagon's squad started dividing into smaller units and moved farther from each other. From a bird's point of view they all looked like a huge arrow spreading miles across and running steadily on the wide field.

Now that they were only six in their unit, it made (Y/N) even more scared. Both because she's so far from Hannah and Lia, and that she could feel the burning stares of the three behind. 

She falls back, making them stop in their tracks for a moment. Glancing at their watchful expressions, she gives them a reassuring smile telling them that she wasn't going to do anything.

"Move forward, I'll feel _uneasy_ if I can't watch you from behind!" She tells them cheerfully, hiding how conscious and worried she felt; it somehow cleared the air off of suspicions. A small sigh of relief escaped her mouth when they continue on without any word.

In the following hour of running forward, the scouts successfully managed to dodge titans in the vicinity by sending signals. Even Levi was amazed with how numerous units acted together to decrease casualties. _That Erwin Smith wasn't in the command unit for nothing after all._

(Y/N) on the other hand was just getting relaxed at the lack of activity from the three when a bright light from above struck.

"Hey, do y'all see that shit?!" The Captain shouts to the rest.

_Oh no._

Dark clouds towered over them as soon as they appeared, with loud thunders rolling after a series of lightning. (Y/N) almost came to a full halt when small drops of rain started to fall. She almost wanted to turn around and go to Hannah and Lia's unit until the small drops turned into bullets of rain. The loud rainfall blocked almost all noise from everyone, the only thing she could hear was Captain Flagon's faint shouting to keep moving forward.

* * *

Further into the trail and it was almost no use to go on anymore. The thick fog and the heavy rain blocked their vision and could only see few feet ahead at best. Running proved to be difficult as well when the ground started to get muddy and slippery. This was just like her dream, _as it should be._

In a few moments, Sairam and Captain Flagon disappeared into the fog. (Y/N) moves to the front of the unit, she was mentally panicking when she saw the two vanish. Left without a choice, she has to be tough and on the lookout for titans hiding nearby.

 _"Great, we lost those two. Time to get back to our plan!"_ Furlan calls on, just enough for Isabel and Levi to hear.

Isabel nods, _"But we have to take care of (Y/N) first!"_ turning to the other girl who was seemingly unaware of the threats that surrounded her. _"Levi! Do it!"_

Levi rushed to her side, ready to do whatever he can to stop her dead in her tracks. He could push her off her horse, and let his knife do the work. Inching closer and closer her voice starts to ring inside his head.

_"I believe somewhere inside you is a softie."_

He tightens his grip on the reins, but the memory of them after their first sparring came back to his senses.

_"Sorry about earlier, I was a bit carried away. I didn't let you get any protective equipment before the training."_

_If I could just..._

Then he goes back to the time when they were trapped.

_"Levi, get down!"_

_If I could just push her..._

_"Are you... hurt?"_

_Tackle her to the ground..._

_"And have you get crushed? I would never."_

_And slice through..._

_"Thank you, Levi."_

_But I fucking can't._

He was close enough to actually doing what he was supposed to do, but the look on her face took him aback.

Tears were streaming down her face, he saw it all fall down even through the downpour. Frightened, she calls him out. "L-Levi! Stay... behind!"

"Find them." He tells her in the most blunt tone.

She fixes her eyes back to the route despite her limited view. "What do you mean?!"

"Go back to your friends, _look for them_." The need for Levi to take her out so she wouldn't get in the way was replaced with the need for her to get out there.

She sighs when she hears those words. "Don't be stupid! I have to get _you three_ back with the Captain and Sairam!"

"Don't you think we could do it by ourselves?"

"I know you can, but I know too that I shouldn't leave–" 

The ground starts to rumble from her left side.

"Levi, get them out of here." She steadily mounts up her horse and prepares to draw her blades. "If you can, keep you ears open for sound grenades." 

He didn't expect this to happen, he might not have been able to kill her, but this incoming titan just might. He hoped that she left there as soon as possible, "But..."

"Do as I say, I'm still a superior of yours." 

He nods in defeat, "I _will find_ you." He looks back to Isabel and Furlan who were surprised that Levi didn't do what he had to.

She didn't think he'd say something like that, but with the smallest bit of hope left inside her, she agrees. "I'll see you when I see you."

They separate ways, and as expected, the other two were disappointed.

" _Why the fuck_ did you not do it?" Furlan angrily scolds him, he didn't exactly know what to answer.

Isabel huffs in disbelief, if it had been her, she would've done it without hesitation. "What if she'll get to us before we could even find that Erwin Smith? What were you thinking?" 

The other man looked at him with disgust, "Don't fucking tell me you care — _for her_?!"

* * *

_"I will find you."_

Those words gave her a small hope, but she knew that she'll either drop dead or be inside a titan's stomach before he could. A small part of her rued herself for letting them go, not anymore because she was suspicious, but because she couldn't protect them. However, she believes that they would do all they can to get back with the unit while she finds her friends through the fog.

She comes face to face with a four-meter titan that was quick to swing an arm trying to grab her off her horse. She leaps off and slices the arm off, blood splashes to her face as she falls back to the ground on her feet. Fortunately, there was a nearby tree she could hook her gear on and slice through its nape. 

Sure that it was dead, she whistles for her horse and the spare to get back. She throws away her dulled blades and gets on her ride, but she hesitated for a moment there.

_Should I look for my friends or go after my unit?_

If that titan wasn't enough sign for her to go two units back, then what would be? 

A sound grenade went off, it was from the direction Levi and the rest were heading. She was sure it was from Captain Flagon, and she was certain the three would meet the rest once again. 

That was enough sign for her to speed off to the opposite direction and brave through the misty field. 

_I can't die without seeing Hannah and Lia, not without knowing they're alright._

But running back proved pointless; aside from the sound of rain falling on the ground, it was quiet, there was no sign that anyone was there at all. She could only pray that they actually went ahead and that they met halfway, but they weren't the only ones. Huge footprints headed towards where she just came from, she realized that titans were actually chasing the rest of the units. If she doesn't hurry back, it would be too late — everyone in the squad would be wiped out.

She heads back while following the footprints on the muddy ground, halting a few times when her horse almost slipped. The footprints seemed to go on forever, making her wonder just how far out and how long she's been looking for them. 

And finally, she faces her enemies. They all turned their backs against, an opportunity she should take before they'd notice she was there. 

One by one, she runs her blades through their napes swiftly, but still careful enough not to break them so soon. Her thoughts were empty except for the need to save everyone; and she'll do whatever it takes, even if it costs her life. 

They all toppled down, the steam from their bodies seemingly making the fog grow thicker. She falls back, satisfied with the fact that maybe it wasn't the end for her squad after all. 

She hops on to her horse one more time and moves forward. Luckily, the fog was thinning out, the scouts wouldn't be too far ahead now. Tightening her grip, she travels faster and faster; hoping that she'll be able to catch up with the rest and not have to worry anymore. She also needed to get to the supply point as her gas was running low and she only had a pair of blades left.

Her hopes were slowly getting up again, when she didn't notice that her horse slipped in the mud and throwing her off of it. Just when she thought it couldn't get any worse, a titan about ten meters tall was running towards her. Possibly an abnormal, it's eyes were glowing and set them on her. She regains her balance and prepared to spend the last of her blades and gas on it. 

As she was about to leap off to a nearby branch behind it, the titan flung her off with its hand. Its sharp nail scratching the side of her head ever so slightly caused a huge cut. She lands several feet away in the most gruesome scene.

Bodies were scattered everywhere; some weren't even recognizable anymore. Some were missing limbs, heads, and some were just limbs and heads with no body at all. It all made her want to throw up, but her first instinct was to find her friends.

Dizzy and suffering from a broken arm, she fumbles around. She tried to check each and every one of the bodies for any identification, hoping that none of them belonged to anyone in her unit, her friends, and to everyone else she held special.

She almost trips on one of the bodies, checking who it belonged to left her scarred.

Captain Flagon laid there, with no signs of life. 

She aimlessly moves backward and steps on a severed arm, this one she knew so well. The arm had a bracelet, one that she had given Lia on her birthday few months back.

_I did everything I could..._

_Why must it still end like this?_

_"(Y/N)..."_ A faint voice called. She turns around and sees Hannah laying down with a large wound on the side of her stomach. She struggles to get to her now that her consciousness was failing her. 

"Hannah!" She puts a hand on the other girl's wound, "Stay with me, we'll get this fixed!"

"There's... no use." The blood keeps streaming through the spaces in between (Y/N)'s fingers. Putting her coat over it didn't seem to work either.

"Please, stay with me." She looks around, hoping someone was alive enough to help them out of there. "I'm sure someone will come along." 

Hannah forces a weak smile, "I think... I've done... enough..."

"But we promised Tommy, remember?" 

"That's why I want you to tell him _I'm sorry_."

"But-"

"(Y/N), listen. I've lost a lot of blood, there's no point in-"

"But I can't lose you too!" The shouting made her even dizzier, (Y/N) herself could pass out at any moment.

"Lia and I will _always_... be with you..."

"Please..."

Hannah closes her eyes for the last time. It was like her mother's death over again. It was the same pain of seeing someone she loved take her last breath as she begged for help that didn't come, over again. 

She tries to cry, but every sob felt like a stab to her chest. She didn't even realize how badly she needed help herself. 

Something started to shake again behind her.

She stays there, figuring it was useless to stand up and call for help when the whole squad was slaughtered. 

It was going to end the same way it did in her dream, _as it should_.

She looks back up, surprised to see a familiar silhouette of a man. Her eyes started to flutter tiresomely, she was slowly starting to fall to the wet ground along with the others.

_Was it too late to change her fate?_

"Levi... you're okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was tough to write tbh,, I had to rewrite this one a few times because my mind was all over the place.
> 
> Thank you so much for continuing to read <333


	10. New Start

"We have already taken care of your citizenship and your residence, Levi. I'm sure that would be enough reward for your service given and will give in the future for the Survey Corps, that is, if you'd fully commit-" 

"Yes, I have made my decision."

" _Hm_ , I was hoping you would say that." The blond looks to the distance at the recently finished burial ceremony. Secretly satisfied that he's earned the other man's trust. "Lovof made a similar offer to you and it's the reason why you _almost_ killed me there, am I correct?"

The black haired man rolls his eyes, "I don't want to have this conversation anymore."

"The only difference is that you won't be staying in the Capital, instead we have given you a new place at Trost District — the closest one to the headquarters."

Hange sprints towards the two; she stops to salute to the Captain and apologized for the interruption.

"Captain, Levi's residence has been prepared. He may move in whenever he'd like."

He gives her a satisfied nod, "I see. Thank you, Hange."

"And _also_ , Captain..."

She whispers into his ear, but Levi can make out most of the words she said.

_"...The doctors say she's stable, but they're still unsure when she'll wake up."_

_"...I'll pay a visit, thank you."_

_"...You're welcome, Captain."_

"I guess you heard that, Levi." He smiles, "When we return to the headquarters, get your things ready and I'll have a ride take you to your new home. You should also see more of the upper world, _you know. Bask in the sun,_ if you will."

Erwin pats his hand on Levi's shoulder, firmly grasping it afterwards. The man didn't even flinch at the touch, his mind wandering off to other places.

"I'll be sending a letter to your address when I have news. For now, _relax_."

The Captain leaves to join the other squad leaders and the Commander as they mount on their horses. 

He stood there all alone under the shade of a tree. It was the first time the sun shone brightly ever since the big storm when they were out on the expedition. It has only been a week.

He tries his best not to look over Isabel and Furlan's gravestones in the distance. He had brought them flowers, ones that he wished Isabel was there to see for the first time and for Furlan to toss around the place.

It was hard trying not to blame himself for what happened to his friends — his only family. 

_"If you begin to regret, you’ll dull your future decisions and let others make your choices for you. All that’s left for you then is to die. Nobody can foretell the outcome. Each decision you make holds meaning only by affecting your next decision."_

The Captain's words stuck to his mind. Albeit tough to live by, he is slowly trying to understand why things had to be done. 

He sighs, the crowd was slowly dying out after giving their farewells to their fallen friends and family. His head was down low as he walked to the rows of horses that were tied to trees. His black stallion was not hard to spot as it was the only one of its color.

"Levi, let's go." Hange tells him, sharing his sentiments as they take a final look on the burial site.

The scouts start moving out of the place and hurried back to the headquarters which was only a few miles away.

_I will miss you._

* * *

It was already noontime when they all got back to the headquarters, Levi sat in his usual place inside the mess hall. He stares at the trees swaying back and forth outside, it was a much better view than the half empty hall. 

Something felt off as he glances to the blank space in front of him. He realizes it was better to sit in silence while two other people rambled about stupid things at the opposite side of the table — it was something he shouldn't have taken for granted. 

_"Can we sit beside?"_ A woman's voice invites herself to the table and sat across him while a tall man with brown hair shared the space beside her. Levi was too bothered to even look or answer. 

_"Hello, I'm Moblit Berner."_ The man offers a hand, but wasn't met by anything in return so he sets it back on his lap. For someone who is as big as him, he surprisingly is timid — a total opposite of his four-eyed friend. 

Hange tries her best to start a conversation with him, but she was only met with silence, a blink, or Moblit secretly telling her to just eat her food before it gets cold. Moblit also repetitively muttered small apologies to the other man for his friend's talkative nature. 

A carriage came pass Levi's view, reminding him that he has a few things to get from the sleeping quarters before leaving. He also has to take the rest of Isabel and Furlan's belongings to the new place, so he drinks the last of his water and stands up.

"You know, Moblit, you should come by– Wait, Levi!" Hange calls to him when she sees her leave and walk towards the door. Levi stops in his tracks and turns back to her with a questioning look in his eyes.

"(Y/N) also lives in Trost, do you wanna come and visit her with us when she wakes up?"

He totally forgot about her after everything that has happened, but now that he heard her name, he wonders how she was now. Upon hearing that (Y/N) was still in a coma, he felt disappointed and frowned. 

He makes his way to the exit without even answering Hange's question. 

Everyone else was busy packing up a few things to bring home. It was standard to give the scouts a lengthier break after an expedition, it helps them get a rest from all that physical, mental, and emotional exhaustion.

Levi neatly puts a few clothes as well as other things inside his bag. It wasn't heavy, considering they didn't bring a lot when they first came.

He was met outside by Erwin who was currently talking to the coachman, possibly for directions. The captain must've noticed the footsteps coming towards him and abruptly ends his conversation. 

"Oh good, you're ready." 

Levi answers him with a simple glance, not in the mood to talk. As he throws his bag in, he accidentally drops the coat that hung on his other arm. Erwin was quick to pick it up.

 _"Use it well."_ The blond whispers to the other man's ear as hands him the coat. Levi didn't think much of it, let alone understand what he meant by it. He throws the coat to his side and hears a few clinks. Before he could say anything to the man who stood outside, the coach moves along. 

Erwin slid a small pouch in the coat; it contained _a lot_ of gold coins. Levi's been given bounties twice or thrice that amount, but the fact that it was given to him for who knows what reason seems to have caught him off guard.

* * *

_"Excuse me, but we have arrived."_ The coachman lightly shakes Levi to wake him up. He flutters his eyes open, running his fingers through his hair.

For someone who is always sleep deprived, Levi took opportunities to sneak in a small nap as much as possible. He also found the ride there to be a bore anyway. Taking all of his belongings, he heads out to see a stairway leading to houses going uphill. 

"The house is supposed to be the tenth one on the left. Should I help you find it?"

He takes a step forward and looks back to the coach man. "No, thanks. I can manage."

"Suit yourself, _young man._ " The man shrugs and goes back to the carriage. It left there as soon as he got up. 

Levi walks up the rock stairs, he earned quite a few stairs from his new neighbors to be. Children and men stepped back as they were met by his icy glare. Young women quickly squealed to themselves when the wind blew his hair revealing more details on his face as the housewives gave snide remarks when they saw the badge on his coat. 

Even with how simple the houses looked, it was definitely better than the cramped spaces he used to live in in the underground. He couldn't imagine how expensive it would be to live in a bungalow when a room he used to rent in cost him a fortune. 

Mentally counting, he approaches the eighth house which definitely smelled like someone was baking pastries. He thinks of the last time he's eaten cookies — it was definitely a long time ago.

Finally, he gets to the tenth house; it looked similar to the rest, only it was cleaner and looked empty from the outside. Maybe he'd need to buy a couple furnitures and a new tea set.

He reaches into his pocket, revealing a small key that Erwin handed to him earlier that day and successfully opened the front door. To his surprise, it was actually fully furnished. There were new pots, plates, and cutlery; with a tea set to complete it. 

It was all satisfactory, up until he brushed his fingers under the dining table. The dust left a very dark smudge on the tips of his middle and ring finger. He sighs disappointedly, but the Corps has done more than enough for him to be grateful that the partly cleaned house wouldn't be much of a big deal.

He explores the rest of the house; checked the bathroom, inspected the corners for dirt, and ran up the stairs to hear if it creaked, but it didn't. A single room on the second floor led to his bedroom, even it was already complete with a bed, a table, a lamp, and a couple wooden drawers. 

_"Hm, not bad."_ He says to himself. He quickly went downstairs to grab the cleaning tools he found by the kitchen, he figured out that he'll bedroom and out. Levi always felt at ease when his surroundings are neat, and finds cleaning very therapeutic especially that he's always stressed out.

Taking a wet cloth, he starts wiping the only window in the room, the view led to the street outside. It would've been a good view if there wasn't a metal grill in the way. He climbs up a stool to reach the upper corners of the glass, he then notices a commotion just across his house.

From his view, it looked like three teenage guys were blocking and taunting a smaller girl who hid something behind. He sighs, thinking it was just normal for them. _Kids._

 _"Hey! Stop!"_ A muffled scream filled the silence as he climbs down the stool. Levi peeked once more and saw the three boys forcefully taking whatever she hid in her hands. 

_"You could just ask your mom for more, it's so simple."_ An obnoxious voice chuckled.

The same voice which screamed hisses, _"Do you think I brought that out here just so you could steal it from me?"_ Even bigger laughs were heard as the girl tried reaching the bag being dangled by the tallest kid.

 _"They're just cookies! Come on, why'd you have to make such a big deal out of it?"_ The second boy counters as he grabs a cookie and almost putting it in his mouth.

"Yeah, why do _you_ make such a big deal?"

The three boys first turned their heads and then the rest of their bodies. "And who do you think you are?" The tallest one juggles the small bag in his hand.

" _Tch_ , I don't answer to immature brats."

The kid he banters with was actually a bit taller than he was. He tries intimidating Levi by inching closer and towering over him. "Why do make such a fuss, _shorty?_ It's literally just a bag of pastry-"

Levi kicks his legs making the boy fall on the ground. His two other friends try to help him up, but he shrugs both their hands in annoyance.

"I said, I don't answer to immature brats. Do y'all want that food so bad? I'll whoop all of your asses first." He fixes a stray hair on his face by blowing it off. The teens stood there in fear and silence. Levi moves closer impatiently, "Well, who's next?"

They toss the bag they stole towards the young girl who clung behind on Levi's shirt. The three immediately run for their lives before Levi could take another step.

Levi would've been fine with kids stealing; been there, done that. But he felt that it was stupid to steal from younger children when there are so many greedy, rich adults that kids can pickpocket from.

"You didn't have to do that." She croaked. "I could've handled those guys and kicked them in the balls."

He doesn't turn around and just walks towards the direction of his house. Thinking that the little girl would leave him alone. "A simple 'thanks' would've been enough."

But small footsteps followed him towards the door.

"What else do you want, kid?" He pauses halfway on the door.

" _Ugh_ , my mom told me that the new neighbors are moving in today. She asked me to give these cookies as a warm welcome." She looks around, peeking through the small spaces Levi didn't block. "Are they here now?"

"Correction, new _neighbor._ " He finally faces the kid and thought her face was very familiar. He doesn't know exactly where he'd seen a similar look before.

Her eyes widen at the look of the new owner who sported a mask and a cloth to cover his head. "Oh, I thought you were a housekeeper." She offers the bag of cookies to him. "Welcome to the neighborhood, there are housekeeping services you could hire from around here by the way."

He takes the bag and takes a final glance at the kid. "I don't trust them." And shuts the door on her.

 _"Hey, a simple 'thanks' or 'looking forward to being great neighbors with you' would've been nice."_ Her muffled voice mocks him.

He sighs, and opens the door to the girl smiling at him. Even the smile looked so familiar. "Thank you for helping me out there, Mister..."

"Levi, just Levi."

"...Levi." She finishes.

Shrugging once more, he returns the gesture by ruffling the top of her head. "Thanks, _kid._ "

"The name's Margot."

"Okay, Margot. You can leave now."

And he shuts the door once more.

* * *

After cleaning the entirety of the house and satisfied with how he rearranged some of the furniture, he sits in the kitchen and opened the treats from earlier. He takes a bite and was delighted. It tasted like a memory he knew he hasn't experienced before.

It felt even better when the sunset drowned the house, orange light giving him a last hug of warmth before it turns dark.

Then he realized.

 _Isabel would've loved these_. He remembers that one time Hange gave her cookies as a sign of friendship. That gesture might've made her change loyalties.

Then he looks to a small pile of books in the living room, imagining how Furlan would've wanted to read them until they bore. 

And then he looks down to his cravat that reflected a peachy color from the sunset. He plays with it with his fingers. 

"Mom, you wouldn't believe it, but I actually got out." He smiles to himself. 

"And now I live in this small house, but it's so much better than the one we used to live in. No rats, no cracks on the floor, and no water dripping from the ceiling." His smile fades when he realizes the deafening silence and lack of activity. He was definitely lonely.

"It'd be so much better if you were here."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This update came in pretty late as I became busy with working on school stuff (I'll be in college next year, hopefully), but don't worry, there's so many things I want to write in the next chapters. :>
> 
> Thank you so so much for the 1K hits!!! I didn't expect that many of you have decided to give my story a shot <3333


	11. The Town

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fiorin - a made up currency

Levi wakes up later than usual, and surprised that it was the best sleep he's had in months. The soft bed definitely felt like it could swallow him whole.

He sits up, watching birds perch on a nest in the tree outside his window. From the noise, he could tell that there were a lot of people on the street. He wonders what could there be that they had to disrupt the only good rest he's ever experienced.

He wanted to take a look at what was going on; but as he saw himself in the mirror with the messiest bed hair and having nothing on but his underwear, he let out an exasperated groan. This is why he doesn't like sleeping in too long — it makes him too lazy.

Nevertheless, he goes down the bathroom for a quick shower. Satisfied with the warm water, he steps out and realizes.

_How am I so fucking stupid?_

He felt lucky that they were kind enough to attach curtains on the windows; the people there weren't too interested with seeing a new neighbor run around naked in his house. 

After that small burst of energy sending him to his room, he plops back down on his bed. Berating himself for such a dumb move. It was strange to be so alone and have more privacy again after such a long time. But instead of wallowing in his loneliness, he got back up and covered himself in a warm, thick robe. Maybe some black tea would wash away the sadness.

Drops of water fell from his hair as he grabbed a stool to reach the tea set on one of the cupboards. If there was something that excited him more than anything, it was taking a sip of a well brewed tea — and he always makes the perfect tea. As he pours water into the pot, he realizes another thing.

_Shit, there isn't any tea._

_Or any food._

Followed by a strong grumble.

 _"I said I just wanted to see what's outside, not interact with people."_ He says to himself as he goes back upstairs. He forgot to remind himself that he had to do some shopping because Erwin insisted he ate fresh food.

* * *

_"Hm, does he not like festivities?"_ The kid thought to herself as she flipped through another page of her book. 

Margot has been sitting outside his house for about an hour now, she wanted to enjoy all the fun on the sunny Saturday. However, she was afraid to hang outside without her friends after what happened yesterday. Then she realized that maybe those big kids wouldn't be around if she stayed close to Levi. 

She doesn't want to think that she couldn't take on bullies, but after someone else stood up for her, she thought that maybe there's so much more she needed to learn.

 _"What do you think you're doing here, brat?"_ She hears a voice that was both calm and daunting at the same time, but she wouldn't expect it to be anywhere near cheerful either.

She met him with a smile, "Are you off to somewhere?" Judging from his rather homey clothes, he might not be going anywhere far. 

"Tch, that's none of your business." He sneers. "Anyway, what's with the crowd?"

She slams her book close and stands up in shock. "You _don't_ know?"

"Do you think I'd ask if I did?"

"Every Saturday is like a feast here!" She moves steps backward and raises both hands in the air. "There's so much to do and see; there's games, puppet shows, flea markets, and a lot of food stalls! Let me show you around!"

"No, thanks. I'm just heading out to buy food." He locks the front door and leaves the girl standing.

"Do you even have a basket or a bag to begin with?"

"I'm sure I'll buy one."

"Don't bother," She runs ahead of him and into the street crowd. "Come on!"

He follows the little girl as she easily slips through big people, he didn't have such a hard time himself. Stopping at the same house he's smelled the baked pastries from yesterday, Margot gets inside.

_"Mom, do we have a spare basket?"_

_"Yes. What for, sweetie?"_

_"The new guy wanted to go to the market and he said he didn't have anything to put stuff in."_

_"Oh, is he outside?"_

_"Yeah, he's by the door."_

_"Alright, give me a second, sweetie."_

About a minute or two later, a grown woman with a pale blonde hair steps out carrying a large basket. She was surprised to see how young he actually was. "I expected newlyweds would move in! You do look pretty young to be living by yourself."

Instead of sneering at her comment, he decides against it. After all the woman didn't seem to have any ill intentions. "I'm actually twenty-six."

"Oh, my apologies." She smiles in embarrassment and finally hands him the basket. "How'd you like the gift I sent yesterday? I hope it wasn't too sweet."

"It was great, thanks."

"I almost forgot!" She chuckles to herself as she offers a hand to shake. "I'm Camille, Margot's mom. It's nice to meet you."

"I'm Levi."

"Why don't you come over some time? I've got someone who's about the same age as you, and I'm pretty sure you two will get along well."

"I'll look forward to that." He says, it was half meant, though. _So this is how neighbors in the upper world interact, how strange._

"I would love to show you the best stalls to buy produce, but given the state I am in now," She rubs the small baby bump that hid under her dress. "It's gonna be too tiring."

He nods, unknowingly feeling soft at the sight of a mother and a baby. "I understand, I'll figure things out myself."

"But Margot can help you though." Camille ruffles the little girl's hair, "Right, baby?"

"Sure can, Mom!" Margot nods proudly like a big girl.

Camille chuckles, "You see, Margot knows the market as much as I do. She might even help you catch a discount — the vendors _love_ her."

Levi didn't want a kid to tag along as he shopped for his needs, but it's not like he could refuse such an offer. If only he hadn't fallen asleep on his way to his house. "Well..."

Margot pulls his free hand as she leads him back to the crowd. "Come on! You won't regret tagging me along."

* * *

As they walk with the pace of the crowd, Margot points to different landmarks that surrounded them.

"That's my school over there!" Her cheery tone reminding him of someone. "And the third window from the left leads to my classroom."

Levi silently nods, like he's been doing for the last fifteen minutes. He didn't want her to lose her enthusiasm in guiding him through the town, but he didn't want to look like a weird tourist who gushes over everything he sees. But honestly, he was enjoying the walk.

She tugs him and points at a sign which had an illustration of books, "That's the public library, you can go and take books home and return them when you're done reading."

 _"For free?"_ He asks, feeling like an idiot that he had to really ask that. 

"Of course! That's why I love hanging out there." She hugs the book that she's been carrying since earlier. "You should definitely borrow a book or two. That is, if you'd like to."

"I'll take note of that."

They both cross the street and into an even larger crowd. Her eyes lighting up to the numerous stalls a few feet away from them. "We're here!"

The market stretched on until the end of the long street. Meats were sold separately from fruits, vegetables, and other dry goods. Further into it was a large outdoor food court with people seated in long tables at the center of the road.

"So, what do you plan to buy?"

"Greens first."

She drags him in front of a huge stall which was filled with all sorts of fruits and vegetables. Just from the smell of it, they all seemed fresh to him. 

"Well if it isn't my little friend, Margot!" The man with a funny accent stood behind the stall and gives a little wave as he sells to the other customers. "What can I help you with?"

"Hello, Otto! My friend is new here, and I wanted to show him where to buy the best produce in the market."

He chuckles proudly at the compliment, "It's lucky you came to my shop! All these came in fresh this morning, why don't you choose?"

Levi silently goes over the produce in front; he wanted to buy what he liked to cook and new appetizing food he wanted to give a taste. He chose a couple potatoes, carrots, leafy green he doesn't know what're called, and fruits such as apples and grapes. And of course, he wouldn't forget his black tea leaves. 

"That'll be all, how much would these cost?" He asks the vendor who mentally counted everything Levi put in his basket.

"Everything is worth twenty-seven fiorin." Otto smiles.

Not believing what he heard, Levi asks once more. _"Twenty-seven?"_

"But because any friend of Margot is also my friend, you'll get five fiorin off."

"You're not joking?"

Margot looks at the man's surprised expression. "Why, Levi? I told you he'd give discounts." 

"Oh, I was just shocked." Looking at the numerous things he's bought, "Your produce here are sold at a very low price."

"You must've been buying from crooks the whole time," Otto laughs. "We sell at the recommended price point, it's illegal to go any higher than that."

He agrees, food in the underground was very scarce and expensive. Even sometimes a little too much than what they were worth. Levi thought he was going to spend more than a hundred in a single go in that stall.

He mutters a small thank you as he gives Otto the exact amount. Margot and Levi both leave the stall and went towards those selling meats.

"Have a great day you two!" 

Margot looks back and gave him the biggest smile. "Bye, Otto!"

As the blend in once more in the crowd, Margot taps the man on his forearm. "Hey can I ask you something?"

"What, kid?" He replies without taking his eyes off the street.

"When you said something about stuff being cheap here, I started to wonder where you are actually from."

He clutches the basket closer to himself when the crowd grew thicker. " _Far away,_ people here wouldn't probably know it exists." 

"Oh, I see." She noticed that he didn't want to talk so much about it and so she just continued to skip along beside him.

She leads him to where the meats of different kind hung and were sliced in different cuts. Levi bought cattle meat and fish that was fresh from the lake. He made a mental note to himself to cook those as soon as he arrived home.

* * *

After all the shopping, Margot lead Levi to the town park and showed him all the fun stuff she herself enjoys watching. 

They both went to check out the puppet show she's been talking about; Levi wasn't all interested in children's stories, but he was kind enough to join the little girl as she listened and watched intently.

He may not show it, but Levi has a soft spot for children. He thinks it might've been the reason why he took in Isabel when she first showed up uninvited to their small apartment in the underground. 

If it was up to his mother, she would've done the same thing. 

_Ugh, not again._ Levi hates in when the littlest things he thinks about reminds him of his mother. What he hated even more was the he himself was a reminder of how his mother would've been like based on her principles, only that she wasn't mad enough to deal with people with a sharp knife.

His sad thoughts were evaded when he heard a loud stomach grumbling, only this time he knew it wasn't his.

"Come on, it's lunch." He stands up and Margot reluctantly followed. 

Going back to that spot in the outdoor food court where Levi smelled some mouthwatering food, he ordered his meal and let the kid choose whatever she liked. 

When their food came, Margot noticed that there were two slices of pie handed. She doesn't remember Levi adding those to his order. 

" _Uhm,_ excuse me, miss? I don't think we're supposed to have pies."

The waitress smiled, "Oh! We actually give free pie slices to siblings who come to eat in our place every Saturdays."

"But we're not-"

"Thanks." Levi cuts off and the waitress leaves.

Margot uses a hand to cover half her face and whispered, _"Why did you lie?"_

"Do you want to eat that or what?" He says, handing her the utensils.

"Yeah I do, but-" Guilt was heard from her voice.

He scoffs, "You know it's bad to decline offers, right?" He passes her the slice and she reluctantly accepts it.

"Fine," She shrugs as they start eating their meals. Then she starts to chuckle.

Giving her a confused look, he looks behind to whatever she might be watching. "What're you laughing at?"

The place was filled with young people — presumably siblings — enjoying the free pies given.

She smiles as she looks to the wonderful surroundings "I just never thought I'd be experiencing things like this."

"Like what?"

She twirls her fork in between her fingers, "You know, having an older sibling." 

Aside from Isabel, she might've been the only person to refer to him as an older brother. "Do you not have any other siblings?"

"No, just the one my mom is pregnant with." 

He finishes chewing before asking any more, "Is that why you're by yourself?" He noticed that no one came to approach Margot even with a lot of children playing all over the town.

She shakes her head and laughs, "I have _Jean and Marco_ , actually." She smiles just thinking about them, "They're away on that _stupid_ boys only camp, I do miss them a lot."

"Jean and Marco?"

She shrugs, "Yeah, they're my friends. We hang out all the time and we're always there for each other. I think I consider them my brothers."

"That's great then."

"Maybe, but we're just at the same age. We think the same way. It's different from actually knowing what older siblings would do." Pouting, she sets the empty plate aside and stared at her dessert. "Because I want to learn how I should get along with my baby sibling soon. Y'know, _building up their trust_ and stuff."

He's impressed, "You're actually very smart for a kid your age. You remind me of someone I know." 

"Are they the same age as me?" She exclaims, maybe she could make a new friend. 

He shakes his head, leaving her quite disappointed. "She's probably as old as I am."

Margot plasters a suspecting grin on her face, "Is she your girlfriend?"

" _Ugh_ , no." Shaking his head once more as he sips his water. The thought of it was almost funny to him. "Just a friend."

She smiles hopefully, "Then I'd like to meet her."

"I'll tell her that one day, I'm sure you'd get along well." He frowns, "That is, if I'd see her again."

"Oh, why?"

"She's sick, that's all I know."

Finishing the small crumbs on the plate, she pouts both because of his friend's state and for not getting enough of the pie. "I hope she'll be okay soon."

"I hope so too."

He gives her his slice, judging from her expression, she's enjoying it. At first she declines and lied about being full, but thanked him for it once she knew he caught on.

* * *

_"Levi, you're okay."_

_She drops to the ground, her lids shutting just as instant._

_Levi was disappointed with himself, he couldn't keep his promise to everyone that they'll see each other alive. Not even her._

_The reason why he couldn't kill her in the first place was that she had the same heart his mother used to have. If he had stabbed his knife through her, it was just like ending his own mother's life._

_"I will find you." Was the last thing he said to the girl, hoping he'd see more of the kindness she's shown him in the last weeks of them knowing each other — hoping he'd still get to spend days with someone who reminds him of his mother._

_But he was too late._

_He felt a strong rumble coming from the fog behind (Y/N), it must've been the one that killed everyone else in the squad. The titan decides to come face to face with him; at this point, his blood boiled with anger._

_Before the titan could take a step further and possibly take the poor girl off the ground and into its mouth, he runs his blades on its body over and over. He was screaming in rage in the process and dropped with the titan at the same time._

_He cries his eyes out, taking the little remaining energy out of his body._

Levi wakes up, feeling tensed with tears and sweat falling down his face. He frantically runs his fingers through his hair as he sits up on his bed.

It's still midnight, the moonlight peeking through his thin curtains. He sees himself from the mirror in front looking all dreadful. 

He couldn't count how many times he's had that dream, it was making him sleepless and triggered his insomnia in most nights ever since that day. 

Grabbing a robe, he goes downstairs to make tea. After what he's seen, he doesn't think he'd be able to fall back asleep anytime soon. 

He lights the lamp on the dinner table and sips on his black tea. It instantly calmed his nerves and washed away the tension. Then she thinks back to (Y/N) and wondering whatever state she was in as of the moment.

Wherever she may be right now, he hopes she'd still wake up soon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello! I'm kinda having some mixed emotions about this chapter sksksksk Levi went from a klutz ;) to sentimental in one chapter I'm so so sorry
> 
> Anyways, I really wanted Levi and Margot to interact more. And I imagined them going to the same places the MC and Erwin went to in the town (I thought it was cute, but let me know what you think!)
> 
> Thank you for continuing to read!! And happy 1.1k hits!!! I really appreciate it :>


	12. Awake

_"I'm going to kill you, Erwin Smith! That's what I am here for!"_

_Mike looked on as the two continued to argue, figuring he should stay back and not get in between. If it weren't for Erwin's strong reflexes, his head would've been cut off in an instant by Levi. Blood trickled from Erwin's palm when he stopped the oncoming blade, his other hand had just recovered from their first fight and now he has to deal with another wound._

_After Erwin had consoled Levi regarding his decisions, he gets up from kneeling without a single sign of being in pain._

_"... Let's move on with the expedition, and I expect you to come with me."_

_As Mike was about to mount on his horse, he smells something that sends a shock to his mind._

_"Wait hold on, Erwin." He sniffs once more to know he was right, "Someone else's still alive here."_

_They both get down as Mike starts to trace the source; Levi on the other hand, didn't move from his position. He was still overwhelmed with everything he's seen._

_"Erwin, come quick!" Erwin was alerted and bolted to Mike's direction. "(Y/N)'s still breathing, but she's unconscious."_

_Erwin checks her body, wondering where all the blood come from. He finds a huge cut on the side of her head and another slice on her left thigh._

_"Shit, I ran out of bandages." Mike says as he rips a huge portion of his own shirt. "I suppose you don't have enough yourself?" He says, referring to Erwin's own wound._

_"Don't mind me-"_

_"Just stop that fucking bleeding of yours first, I can't carry two wounded soldiers on my own in case you fall and faint as well."_

_Erwin sighs and wraps the cut on his palm, the cloth effectively stopping most of the bleeding. As Mike wrapped her head with his own shirt, Erwin tears his own and tied it as tight as he could on (Y/N)'s thigh._

_Mike checks her pulse once more and noticed her heart beat was dropping. "Think you can carry her on your back? We don't have enough time."_

_Erwin agrees and removed his drenched coat, he kneels down as Mike tries to lift (Y/N)'s back unto the other man's. Mike held her as carefully as he could as Erwin wrapped her with the coat and secured the ties._

_Levi, who was quietly watching the others, felt a sense of relief when he realized that it was her. Maybe it wasn't the end after all._

_Mike helps Erwin up his horse and made sure (Y/N) sat comfortably as well._

_"Let's move," Mike shivers as the cold wind touched his now bare torso. "That goes out to you too, Levi."_

* * *

She flutters her eyes open, wincing when the sunlight hit her eyes. When they finally adjusted, she looks around at the unfamiliar ceilings and windows.

_Is this heaven?_

A small sigh left her mouth, almost as if she forgot how to move her body. 

_"Doctor, she's awake!"_ A female voice gasps and her voice slowly fading as she left.

_Where am I?_

_"(Y/N)? Thank goodness."_ A familiar voice of a man approaches with a sense of relief. _"Can you see me?"_

"Dad." She mutters under her breath as her blurry vision and muffled hearing started to get clear.

She realized that the old man was in tears, but held back from hugging her knowing how weak she still was.

"I thought I'd lost you."

"Am I... _still_ alive?" Her voice sounds clear enough for her father to hear now. 

"Of course you are."

The nurse tells Victor that she should leave to give them some time. He helps (Y/N) sit up on her bed as it was hard to do with a broken arm.

"What happened?"

"You earned a lot of injuries during the expedition," She agrees, judging from the state she's in. "You have been in a coma for almost three weeks now. I... thought... I thought I wouldn't see you open your eyes again."

She felt a tight constriction in her throat; she once thought that she was ready to sacrifice her life to save everyone else, but it didn't come to her mind what her loved ones would've felt if her life did end right at that moment.

Victor sobs, "I couldn't handle seeing you leave because of the pain you went through, not after what happened to your mom."

She stays silent, not knowing how to respond to something so painful. She let her tears fall down her cheeks and on to the blankets, as her father held her free hand. It was only a matter of time until her mood changed from being in despair to numbed.

"I _may_ be alive," She mutters, not a single emotion can be seen on her face now. "But I couldn't save them, so _what's the point?_ "

She thinks back to all the people she could've saved if she could control her dreams. It could've been her mother, her comrades, or anyone she saw in them that called on desperately for help.

"Listen, you're not responsible for-"

"Partly, I am." (Y/N) looks at her father with the dullest eyes, "I could've warned everyone else that _shit_ was going to happen," She sighs in exasperation, almost smiling sarcastically when she did. "But who would believe me?"

"All of these tragic events are beyond your control, (Y/N). It's fated to happen. I'm sorry I have to say this, but whether you caution everyone or not, your dreams were meant to become real." He rubs his forehead in frustration, "I can't have you blaming yourself for all of this all the time, please. It hurts me as much as it hurts you."

Victor paces across the room, left with nothing else to say. He was mad, but not exactly sure at whom. After all, (Y/N) was only a victim of a curse passed down; and so were all the women before her.

"Maybe you're right, I can't change my dreams by _myself._ "

Her words made him turn to her with widened eyes, "What do you mean?"

"In my dream," She tries to recollect the series of events. "I died right then and there; after seeing everyone else was dead, and I was finished off by some abnormal titan."

"You mean to tell me, that someone else might be able to stop all your premonitions?"

* * *

"Yes. Levi has settled in his new residence, Commander." The blond eyes his senior in all seriousness, he was given a satisfied smile in return.

Swirling the teacup in his hand, the Commander tries to bluff around. "Good, let's hope he wouldn't wreck the whole place."

"I don't think he's like that as a person, Commander." His innocent reply seemed to have earned him a loud chuckle from Shadis, quite surprised he'd take it seriously.

"C'mon Smith, I was just kidding."

"I apologize, I didn't catch on quickly."

The laughs started to fade as they both took sips from their cups. "Say, how did you find that house so easily? And to think you didn't leave the headquarters when you told me you found one."

"I..." He remembers the day he hung out with (Y/N) and unknowingly frowned. "I had some help."

" _Mhm,_ I see. You should check on him from time to time, making sure he's well supported. We're still not done gaining his trust, you know."

The Corps already gave Levi pocket money so that he could spend them on his needs, but Erwin felt like he owed the man personally, hence giving him more in secret.

"I guess that'll be all for now, I'll see you when I send a letter to your office." The Commander puts down his cup, contented with what news he's heard. "And please, don't forget to work on the report."

"Yes, Commander."

The Commander dismisses Erwin as he salutes and leaves the room. Erwin closes the door behind and sighs, finally he could now take a small vacation. He looks around to the empty hallway and expecting to see someone, but not one came to pass. 

He decides to take a stroll on the grounds, hoping he'd find who he was looking for. And he did.

A man taller than he was stood in the distance, playfully running his hand through another scout's short and pale blonde hair as they laugh along under the shade of the tree. In a moment, he brushes his long fingers on the side of her small face and the corner of her lips. He leans in...

"Fraternizing with another soldier during work hours is forbidden and will be given serious sanctions."

"Would you give me a favor and just _shut the fuck up_ for a moment? Does that seem so hard for you to do _eyebrow?_ "

Erwin scoffs at his friend's annoyed remark, the girl seemingly enjoying his pissed expression as well. "Get mad all you want, _big nose._ I'm still your Squad Leader and if it were someone else who'd catch you red-handed, I'll be _dead._ "

"It's not like we're still having work today," Mike straightens his posture and snobs. "We only got left behind for a few days here because you insisted, remember?"

"Yeah, I appreciate that." Erwin gives him an apologetic smile. "I wanted to hangout with you two, that's why I'm proposing we go to the lake and fish."

" _Wow,_ that's new." The girl exclaims. "Yeah I'm down, I'm getting bored of Mike doing all the planning." 

"That's as if you're not enjoying my company, _Nana._ " Mike teases, Erwin secretly gushing over the two.

Nanaba shrugs, "I didn't say anything."

Erwin gets in between, "I hope you guys packed-"

_"Captain!"_

Another scout joins the three and he was panting, telling Erwin he's been looking everywhere for him. He hands him a letter and left as soon as he did.

He opens it right then and there, it didn't look like it was confidential anyway.

> _Dear Captain Erwin Smith,_
> 
> _Greetings!_
> 
> _I have written to you this letter to inform you that (Y/N) has regained her consciousness. She may be visited in the hospital anytime now._
> 
> _I felt the need to tell you of her current state as I am indebted to you after saving my daughter from a near death experience during your latest expedition._
> 
> _I hope you are in good health._
> 
> _Sincerely,_
> 
> _Dr. Victor (L/N)_

Without another word, Erwin bolts to his office to take his things. The other two followed suit, but were still confused by the Captain's actions.

"What the _hell_ are you hurrying for?" Mike pants, while Nanaba half sprints behind the two.

Erwin smiles, possibly the widest one they've in such a long time. "She's up."

" _Who's_ up?" Mike thinks for a moment. "Oh."

Nanaba claps in excitement, "Oh my gosh, (Y/N) woke up? That's great news! We should definitely go and see her."

"You two are _coming_ with me?" The Captain exclaims, thinking the two would go ahead with their own plans for the day until they regroup.

Mike crosses his arms over his chest, sporting a cocky grin. "Yeah of course, I wanna see how you score."

"It's not like that, Mike." 

"Of course it definitely is." Nanaba chimes in, teasing the blushing blond. 

Mike scoffs, "Who in their right mind would ask a flower shop to deliver flowers daily to someone who isn't conscious enough to see them yet?"

"I- Well first of all, it's just a friendly gesture and a small token of gratitude. Second, it brightens up her room. Finally, _fuck you._ " The last two words caught Nanaba and Mike off guard before snickering to themselves. Erwin only curses when he's around Mike, and only when he's flustered.

The taller man shrugs and gives Erwin another smug look. "Whatever you say, _Captain._ "


	13. A Friend

"These smell really good." Mike points to a bunch of peonies in front of a flower shop. Nanaba agrees and tells Erwin to get them as they also looked very pretty. Erwin didn't think twice and bought a bouquet.

"You never gave me a bouquet when I woke up after I fainted." Nanaba pouts jokingly, "I thought we were friends."

Erwin smells the flowers with eyes closed before answering, "I gave you my best friend, wasn't that enough?"

"I don't know, it kinda seemed like Mike was just panicking." Nanaba shrugs, looking back to Mike who was still amused with the fragrances that surrounded him. But he was quick to react when he heard them talking about his embarrassing confession during the expedition.

"Hey! I... I was worried, okay?" He then reveals something from behind, a bunch of frangipani flowers. It surely made the girl turn as red as a tomato. "None of these flowers smell as good as you, though."

Nanaba was glad to accept the gift and smiled sweetly at him, "Thanks for trying." 

The three arrive at the hospital, (Y/N) might've been the only scout that was confined there as requested by her father. 

Taking a deep breath, Erwin gets inside the main hall of the hospital and to the information desk. "Excuse me, may we know which room (Y/F/N) is staying?"

The woman assigned flips through the pages on the big notebook in front and uses a finger to skim through the names. "204... It's on the second floor, fourth room to the left, Sir."

"I see, thank you."

They reach upstairs and found the room easily. The other two insist Erwin should knock. After doing so a couple of times, no one seemed to answer. 

Defeated, he looks down. "Maybe she's asleep."

"Come on, Erwin. _Really?_ After all that sleeping?" Mike leans on the nearby window and watched the view of the hospital grounds. Patients were relaxing all over the place. He then recognizes a familiar silhouette in the distance. "Maybe she's getting some fresh air?"

Nanaba and Erwin peeked as well, and saw her sitting on a bench all by herself. They go back down and headed to where (Y/N) was. As Erwin nears the bench, 

"Captain Erwin Smith." A deep voice calls from behind. Erwin was met by a doctor who had a striking resemblance to (Y/N), only with stronger features and a pair of glasses. The other two turned around and we're surprised as well.

They all shook hands and exchanged names, Mike secretly sniffing the acquaintance. "You must be (Y/N)'s doctor?" 

" _And_ father, yes." Victor smiles, "I'm delighted to meet you all. Thank you for coming here to visit (Y/N), I'm sure she'd be happy to see you as well."

"We hope so too." Nanaba exclaims.

"Well," Victor fixes his coat. "I'd love to have a chat with all of you, but I've got places to be. So if you'll excuse me." He gives them a final nod before heading opposite to their direction.

Making sure the doctor was far enough, Mike chuckles and pats Erwin's shoulder, " _Damn._ We just met (Y/N)'s father, how are you feeling?"

 _"Great."_ Suggesting from the sweat on his temples and hands, he seemed to feel otherwise.

"Yeah, _great._ " Nanaba says sarcastically, "Is that sweat on your face, _Captain?_ " She tries to put a hand where she saw a drop.

"Can you two," Erwin berates quite too loud that he paused and sighed, _"...cut it out?"_

The two finally stopped, but secretly were still judging Erwin. They approached the bench she sat on, but she didn't even notice as she was preoccupied with watching whatever was on the opposite direction.

"Mind if we join you?"

She jolts slightly and her eyes widened at the sight of the three, "Captain, Nanaba, Mike... What are you doing here?" She moves to the side to give more space, but none of them sat just yet.

"We got news that you're up now," Mike waves his hand at her with a childish smile. "Since when?"

She counts with her hands, "About four days ago."

"Oh, I see." He nods. Nanaba suddenly started feeling the pockets in her coat for something. 

" _Shoot,_ I think I _dropped_ my notebook somewhere." Nanaba shoots Mike a pleading look, but Erwin thought of something else. "Mike, could you help me _find_ it?"

"What? Can't we do it-" Mike didn't catch on to what she meant just yet. "Oh, yeah. _Sure._ Erwin, (Y/N), we'll be back, alright?"

Erwin was right

 _"Mike! Nanaba!"_ He sneers as he gives the two a glare, asking them to get back. Unfortunately, his authority didn't work well in that moment. He turns back to (Y/N) and gave her a half fake and half nervous smile.

"I hope they find it," (Y/N) says softly, watching Mike and Nanaba trying to look for the missing notebook back to where they came from. 

"I'm _sure_ they will." Erwin was still annoyed with the stupid scheme they pulled out, but maybe it would be less awkward if those two didn't hung around anywhere near them.

He looks at her pale face; she still looked a little frail and soft, in contrast to her usual bright and energetic facade. But she was definitely better than the last time he saw her, when she was confined in the hospital after their expedition. 

She still has thick bandages wrapped on her head, arm, and thigh. Erwin never really knew the extent of her injuries until they brought her to the medic at the nearest supply point. 

He frowns at the sight, "How... How have you been?"

But her small smile somehow brightened his mood, "Still as every bit of injured, but I'm getting better now."

"I'm glad you are." He gives her the bouquet to which he apologized for almost forgetting. Her pale cheeks were then tinted with pink, she tries to cover them by pretending to smell the peonies — they do smell amazing, though. 

"Captain, you didn't have to." She sets them on her lap as she slightly touches the warm part of her face.

Erwin shakes his head and chuckles, "Oh please, call me Erwin. I came to see you as a friend, I won't be talking about anything work-related. Unless you ask."

"Well. Thank you, _Erwin._ " Calling him by his first name still feels foreign to her. "I really appreciate you guys taking time to visit." And she frowns.

He examines her gloomy expression, "What's wrong? Does anything hurt?" She shakes her head and looks down to the bouquet.

"No, it's just that it's been lonely." Her fingers absent mindedly ran through the edges of the petals, Erwin took her hand and rubbed the back of it with his thumb. 

"I'll be here. I mean, we're here for you when you need anyone." He wasn't exactly good with words, but the small gesture was enough for her.

"Thank you." She examines his wounded hand, she was sure it wasn't the same one from weeks ago. "But enough about me, are _you_ doing well?"

"Exhausted, to be honest. Fortunately, I'm almost done with the reports on the expedition; a little revision should do the trick." 

She could see just how tired he was, but he tries not to show so much. "So, what do the new reports show?"

A small smile crept up on his face, "There was a slight decrease in the casualties because of the new formation, but it would've been a more drastic change if the weather didn't take a turn so suddenly."

"That's good to know."

Shrugging, (Y/N) sensed that Erwin didn't have so much confidence in himself. "Kind of, it's just that small numbers don't mean so much to the press and the public. And they'd be even more disappointed to know that most deaths were due to an unpredicted storm. If only it was called off sooner."

"Erwin, you've done your best. Do you think things would be any different if it weren't for the formation you devised?" Her words seemed to have lifted a small burden in his chest. "And it wasn't your fault, _none_ of it was."

"(Y/N)..."

The two fell silent for a couple minutes. They turned to watching old patients playing a board game in the distance, a mother feeding her newborn baby under the shade, and a group of nurses just taking a break. 

Erwin couldn't resist staring at her worn out expression, it seemed to have taken effect on him as well. He scooches closer to her and let her head rest upon his shoulder. She was surprised but felt like she needed that.

She exhales heavily, "You know, I blame myself for the deaths of my friends, my comrades, and my squad leader. I hate myself for not getting to them on time."

"But you said-"

"I know. It's tough, but I'm slowly learning how to go easy on myself. And I felt that you should too." She held his wounded hand tighter in assurance, yet it felt more soothing than painful for him. 

Erwin was just speechless, he never knew how much he wanted to hear those words until she said them. He lets out a small and sad chuckle that confused the girl. She asks him what was so funny, and he shrugs.

"I really can't stop talking about work and now we're both getting sad about it, I'm sorry."

Her reassuring smile never fails to lighten up his mood, "That's alright, I like hearing you talk about the things that interest you."

"Oh. I appreciate that." His cheeks started to feel warm; (Y/N) noticed him turn red, but never said anything about it.

"But let's not get too emotional over here, why don't we ask each other questions? That way I'll get to know you as _my friend_ and you'll get to know me as _yours._ "

"Why don't you start?" He points to her, "I don't wanna go past boundaries."

She thinks, " _Hm,_ when is your birthday?"

"Fourteenth of October, you?"

"Close, twenty-fifth of October. Now it's your turn to ask."

"Cake or pie?"

"Pie, cakes are too sweet for me."

 _"Hm,"_ He makes a mental note to himself to give her one on her birthday. "I like pies better as well."

* * *

They asked each other about their pet peeves, scariest experiences that would just seem weird for others, things they liked to collect as kids, and so much more. The two realized that they had so many similarities that they didn't notice the time passing as they got deeper into their conversation. 

" _Hm,_ I guess you're a very interesting person. I like that." She liked the way his blue eyes glowed even brighter in the setting sun. She unknowingly remembered her dream about kissing someone, as soon as she was aware, she broke her eye contact with him and looked to the sky. "Oh no, I just realized that visiting time is almost over."

"Is it? Shoot. _Do you want to go back to your room now?_ " Erwin immediately regrets the way he said it.

(Y/N) flushes, "Wh-what...?"

"I- You should get some rest, or eat. I may have taken a lot of your time today." The fact that he stuttered made him mentally curse himself. 

_Of course he meant that, what else would it be?_ (Y/N) tells herself. She slowly stood up, wincing in the process because of the wound on her thigh. She forgot to bring her crutches as it was her dad who assisted her on her way to the bench. Erwin was quick to notice it, however. And he let her cling onto his arm for support. 

Little by little, they walked back inside the building together. (Y/N) secretly felt bad that he had to fall in her slow pace, but Erwin surely didn't seem to mind. However, the way up the second floor felt like it was going to take forever. He did manage to find a solution.

"Do you mind?"

"What?"

He picks her up in bridal style. It was a shock for her, but she had no other choice and just held her bouquet in place. (Y/N)'s heart was just pounding like crazy, as her thoughts were running wild. _How can he be so calm?_

But he wasn't.

Erwin felt like he was going to explode because of his impulsive actions. His hands were sweating trying not to touch any of her skin as he carried her to the next floor. He kept thinking whether or not (Y/N) was uncomfortable with what he did.

But she wasn't.

When they reached upstairs, the nurses and the other patients in the hallway recognized who he was and started to whisper to themselves.

_Isn't that Erwin Smith of the Scouts?_

_Damn. He's strong, attractive, and has a girlfriend? He definitely has it all._

_Wait, isn't that Dr. (L/N)'s daughter?_

_(Y/N)? I heard she's secretly fierce._

_She's in the Scouts as well, no wonder why they'd work well with each other. She's sure as hell really powerful, they said._

_I wish I was her!_

_I wish I was him!_

As they made a turn to the left, he saw two silhouettes just leaning against the opposite walls, having a conversation. He puts her down carefully just a few steps away from them. 

"Did you find it, Nanaba?"

Nanaba waves a small notebook in the air, "Yeah, fortunately it was just _right here._ I _forgot_ that we went up earlier when we were looking for you."

"Leg's still a bit sore, (Y/N)?" Mike sneaks a wink at Erwin as he looks back to her, waiting for an answer.

She nods and tells him that it'll be fine soon. She turns back to Erwin and looks him in the eyes. Her expression was still weak, but it was so much better than the last few days. 

"Thank you — all of you — for stopping by." She smells the peonies once more. "And for the flowers, they're very pretty and smell fantastic."

Erwin mouths a small thank you to the two who stood behind (Y/N), they give him thumbs up and full smiles to cheer him in return. "As your _new_ Squad Leader, I expect you to get fully recovered. I will be sending you a letter every now and then to check if you're ready to get back to work."

"Yes, Captain." She salutes to him even with a broken arm, she mutters a small 'ow' when she placed it over her chest. 

"And as your friend, please don't do that if it still hurts." He gives him a worrying look that made the rest laugh. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A double chap makes up for the late update (I think) hehe :>
> 
> Anyway, this one was pretty bittersweet and I was also gushing over the two as I was writing (i kinda wish i could experience this cuteness irl :'< )
> 
> THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE 1.5K HITS! I didn't expect this amount of support to come :'> I hope you are enjoying the story so far, stay safe always, wash your hands, wear face masks, i love you all <333


	14. Checking Up

> **_Military Police Falls Victim in Recent Killing_**

> _Yesterday morning, a man identified to be a member of the Military Police Brigade was found dead in his assigned station at Stohess District, Wall Sina._
> 
> _According to the investigation conducted by the MPB, the police was brutally murdered while he was on duty the night before. Military Police Officer ×××××× has been the third victim in the month of ×××××× alone. The MPB suspect that the latest killing is the work of infamous serial killer Kenny the Ripper. The serial killer has been accused numerous times in the past for the same crime. However, the MPB has yet to identify his true motive._
> 
> _Despite the murders only being done in one military regiment, Commander-in-Chief Darius Zackly warns soldiers of all regiments — including the Garrison and the Survey Corps — to heighten their security for any future attacks._

* * *

  
"Good, now you're all set." The nurse smiles as she smooths out the small patch on the girl's head. (Y/N)'s stitches are finally getting better and the bandages that once wrapped around her head were finally changed into smaller ones that looked better. She mutters a small thank you and the nurse leaves. She grabs a small mirror on the bedside and checks her face and the patch for herself. The wound on the left side of her head ran in a single long line. Luckily it wasn't too big, but it was definitely noticeable when it would fully heal. Her other wounds seemed close to full recovery as well; when her arm will finally be as good as new and when she finishes her last dose of medicine, she'll go back to work.

She sets the mirror back on the table frowns at the sight of a white envelope she's kept ever since she woke up from her coma.

_Letter of Resignation_

Over the course of her recovery, she's been going back and forth whether she would just retire from being a scout and live a peaceful life. Her family agreed that it would be the best for her, but respected her decision if she continued. After some time, (Y/N) realized that she wanted to keep fighting; fight until their deaths held more worth than ever before.

(Y/N) has been set to go home after almost a month of being in the hospital. She was going to miss the comfort her temporary home had; the nurses, the doctors, the other patients, and the whole place in general. However, she would much rather go back to their house and spend the rest of her leave in a much quieter environment. She picks up the little belongings she set on the bed — a small bag, a coat, and a small notepad Victor gave her so she had somewhere to write the details of her dreams. The latest entry she had was from earlier; it baffled her as she didn't know how it could connect to her, but she decided to write it just in case.

> _12th of September, 844_
> 
> _MPB, murder... Kenny the Ripper?_

As far as she knows, _Kenny the Ripper_ allegedly killed numerous Military Police officers a few years ago. His existence was more of a myth than an actual case that they should keep an eye on, but it did scare some trainees that they didn't bother trying to get qualified for the MPB. Fortunately in the recent times, no one has ever heard or read of his name in announcements and in the daily paper.

She places the notepad inside the bag when she heard knocking from outside. Her father came in with the last dose of her medication wrapped in a small paper bag.

"Are you ready?" He asks as he hands her the item, careful not to wrinkle the paper. 

She smiles excitedly and stretches her arms up. "Yeah, I just wanna go home and lie in my bed."

"Well... Actually, about that-"

A pale blonde girl walks in with an even bigger smile plastered on her face. She raises her arms to give the other girl a tight hug. "(Y/N)!"

"Camille?!" (Y/N) breaks away from the hug to look at her with a surprise. "What brings you here?"

Camille looks to Victor with confusion, "He didn't tell you?"

The three of them exchange glances, (Y/N) still having no clue. "Tell me what?"

The blonde tugs the other girl's free arm in excitement. "That you'll be staying with us, of course!" She squeals as she thinks of the things they could do. It's been boring for her ever since Pierre had to work in a different district for two months.

"What?" (Y/N) pulls away from her tug slowly, "No, I can't- I shouldn't."

Victor clears his throat and clarifies his reasons. "Listen, (Y/N). I won't be home for two weeks, I'll be visiting a lot of villages along with other doctors so I won't be able to monitor you everyday."

" _Thank you,_ but I can totally handle myself now. Plus, I wouldn't want Camille to experience hassle when she has me around — not in the _state_ she's in."

"Come on, don't worry about me." Camille reassures (Y/N), and rubs her own belly. "I'm doing fine; and also, Margot would really love it if you came to visit."

(Y/N) finally gives in, but on one condition. "Sure, but maybe just for a week? I have some places to be when my arm gets better."

The other two agree, "Well, one week it is."

* * *

_Knock._

It's the third knock Levi has heard from his front door; he didn't want to open it too soon, the person might think he was waiting for someone to get inside, which he definitely wasn't. He cringed at the thought and waited for them to knock once more. Once it came, Levi walked towards the door in long strides. He was quite taken aback by the person on the other side.

The blond's blue eyes darted to his icy grays. "Good morning, seems like I came too early?" His pleasing tone didn't seem to get past through Levi. In fact, his enthusiasm seemed to have ticked the shorter man off. 

"Why are you here?" There was nothing in the way he said those words that suggested he was interested with the sudden arrival of his new Squad Leader. The man could've just sent a letter for their convenience, but Levi thinks it must've been very important or urgent that the time it takes to send a message wouldn't suffice.

Erwin places his hands on the pockets of his coat, feeling more relaxed than a few moments ago. "I just came to check how have you been doing — as requested by the Commander."

And as expected, he was disappointed by his reason. He sighs, exasperated. "You really have your head buried deep in your work, don't you? Do you not have any friends?" 

"And I suppose _you_ have?" Erwin instantly regretted his choice of words, and suggesting from Levi's usual expression, it scared him secretly. "I apolo-"

" _Tch,_ fuck it." Levi shifts to the side so Erwin could pass through the door, "I can't be arsed, I only take insults seriously from people who drink black tea." Erwin could've sworn he saw the smallest bit of hurt in his eyes, but at the same time, he didn't want to read what exactly Levi felt. He felt even guiltier by the second and wanted to bury himself in his olive green trench coat. Much to his surprise, the shorter man seem to have dismissed the topic after talking about his fondness of black tea.

Levi leads Erwin to the dinner table. To be honest, the house looked so much better than when he first inspected it, and even neater than the one he shared with Mike — it was a _hellhole._ He could tell it was cleaned every single day and was spotless, he felt a slight guilt from coming inside with his boots and sitting on one of the chairs. The other man places teacups for them both and poured the warm black tea. He sits across Erwin and both shared a soft glare. Erwin notices that Levi holds his teacup in a peculiar way, it was fitting to his cool attitude nonetheless. "He sent you here to know if I hadn't run off, didn't he?"

"I don't know what you're talking about, Levi." Erwin plays it off as he sips his tea.

Levi scoffs and crosses his legs, obviously quick enough to catch on. "Of course you do, _smartass._ But lucky for you guys, you _have_ my trust. I will continue to be a part of the Survey Corps and your squad, you have no more reason to doubt me and my intentions."

"I never doubted you, I knew that you'd be persuaded to join sooner or later." Erwin looked like a child proudly showing off the ends of his plans. 

"I... I used to think you were all stupidly brave for having to explore outside when it's safe inside the walls, but I've seen that you would do anything just to be free — willing to sacrifice everyone's lives to eliminate all things that harm humans." Levi felt stupid for letting his guard down around this man, but it was too late to take back his words. The blond stopped sipping his tea midway, taken aback by the other's reflection on the experience. "I felt the same way when I wanted to get out of that god forsaken underground city."

Erwin slightly melted in his seat after learning that they somehow shared the same goals and mindset. "I see. And because you chose to stay, humanity will be a step closer to freedom." He says with so much hope, he tries to hide his smile by sipping more. "Tell me, how did you figure out how to kill titans so easily?"

Levi raises a brow, and fixes his posture to assert dominance and pride. _"Tch,_ I can kill a man with a small knife in a single slit. With the gears and blades, it's just as easy."

Erwin grabs for a pen and a small pad from one of his pockets, "Don't mind me, the Commander just wants things to be recorded. He wouldn't believe I came here."

" _Sure,_ even if it doesn't make sense."

_"Even if it doesn't make sense."_ Erwin chuckles. It was indeed pointless to have to go all the way to this man's location just to ask how he's been when he could've been enjoying his small vacation now, but he didn't want to be sanctioned of insubordination either. He writes a couple words in the pad before glancing back to Levi. "Say, how've you been adjusting to life here?"

Levi shrugs, "Good, _surprisingly._ No one's ever talked to me while holding a knife, well, except for those butchers in the market." To be honest, that made Erwin laugh. Somehow, this man has a few jokes up his sleeve he can pull out with ease. Levi was even more interesting and enjoyable in this perspective than he expected.

"Are you not having a hard time doing day-to-day activities?" 

"No, but buying liquor out here can be a _bitch._ " Levi replies bitterly. The other man looks at him, with his wondering expression. "The staff at the store won't let me buy a few bottles unless I had some proof. I have to carry my papers all the time." He sips the last of his tea before he pours some more. He offers to do the same on the other man's cup and he gladly accepts.

Erwin writes down the details in the pad, "Remind me to get you an identification card next time."

" _Sure,_ knock yourself out."

He closes the pad and shoves it back in his pocket, seemingly satisfied with Levi's answers. "Well from the looks of it, you seem to be doing fine. And I have to say, this place looks neat." Levi sits there unamused by his praise. Of course, no one cleans better than himself. Erwin looks at him awkwardly, looking for other things to talk about until he could finish his drink. Then he gets reminded. "Oh, also..." Erwin chuckles to his forgetfulness.

"Hm?"

"You should prepare soon, because I _might be_ needing you in a special- No, I _actually_ need you to be part of a special task."

Levi straightens his posture for the nth time, his eyes shined even more that the rays of the sun have reached inside the house. Erwin has never seen him half as interested in a topic as he is at the moment, and he felt relieved that he'll be serving the Corps for quite some time if he keeps the same attitude towards missions. "And what would that be?"

"I'll disclose more information by the time (L/N) gets back. Since you both are extremely skilled just like a select few of my scouts, I considered having you two be part of a special squad."

"I see. Speaking of (Y/N)..." Erwin's ears perked up when he hears her name. "How is she now?" Whenever Levi's mind came across her name, he would remember the tough time she had during the expedition; and whenever he thought about her, he's also visited by an unnecessary guilt for just letting her fall unconscious and almost devoured by some extremely fast titan.

"I didn't know _you_ had any _interest_ in any of the Scouts." The blonde smirks, from what Levi could read in the tone of his voice and his expression, _was he jealous?_

Levi scoffs, "Don't get me wrong, Smith. My concerns for her are nowhere near yours, don't stress it out." He quickly dismisses any thought that could've come into the other man's mind. "I just want to know if using the last of my blades out there was worth it."

"I apologize, but yes. (Y/N) has been doing very well in the past weeks. I heard that she has been discharged from the hospital now and will be back in service sooner than expected." He was surprised at how good Levi read him, and felt guilty he had said those words in such a way.

Levi felt some sense of relief, "That's... _good to know._ "

"Are you two getting along well?" Levi's mind went blank, he doesn't exactly know how to put their relationship into words.

"She's competitive and open minded. She handles arguments very well too, and I don't have a problem with that."

"I'm glad you are." He offers a hand to shake and unsurprisingly turned down. "I won't be long now, thank you for your time and for the tea. You may go back to doing whatever your plans are." Erwin heads to the door and stops midway, "Don't get me wrong though, I have no problem with you getting involved with any scout in particular. However, do draw a fine line between work and personal matters."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey everyone!!! It's so good to be back to writing after 3 (?) months!! I've kept my drafts for too long because school's really stressful, even more so that I'm doing it 100% at home :/ I'm really glad that y'all still read the story and leave kudos on it!! It means a lot to me really <3
> 
> P.S please don't think that I've lost interest in the story... In fact, I've still got a lot of ideas; I just need the perfect time to type 'em up :>


	15. Thoughts of You

_“Aunt (Y/N)? Are you up?”_ A familiar muffled voice calls from the other side of the door. She wasn’t exactly sure if it was a dream, but it was enough to make her shift positions in her bed. The warmth of the sun rays lightly touched her skin, as if telling her that it was indeed morning already. Margot calls on once more to tell her that her mom’s already made breakfast and teased (Y/N) about her niece finishing her share.

(Y/N) groggily sits up and ties her hair up while mentally reminding herself to get a haircut as it has grown too long. Absent-mindedly, she stares at the nest full of nightingale chicks chirping on as their mother brings them worms for breakfast. She read off somewhere that nightingales were a symbol of love, the thought of it brings her back to her latest encounter with her new squad leader. She couldn’t help but blush and feel the warmth of her cheeks with her palms.

But instead of her mind continuing to run wild over the blond man and his insanely ocean blue eyes, she stumbles upon that memory she had with the man polar opposite of Erwin.

She subconsciously wonders how Levi was doing every now and then ever since she woke from her coma; after all, he was the last thing she saw and surely, the last words she said before falling unconscious was even directed to him. As exaggerated as it may seem, (Y/N) believes that he might be the one who could’ve changed her fate, and she wanted to say her gratitude for giving her another shot at life.

_“C’mon, Auntie! Your food will go cold!”_

She snaps out of her thoughts, slightly annoyed by the interruption. “Alright! I’m coming!”

As she goes down the stairs, she was met with some of the most scrumptious smells: eggs, pancakes, tea, and even freshly baked bread. Camille hangs her apron on a spare chair when (Y/N) approached to help her with setting the plates. A smile involuntarily escapes from her lips as she went back to thinking about ways she could thank the man when they meet again.

“Good morning, you seem to be in a good mood.” Camille thought it was strange that (Y/N) continued to place the utensils on the table without saying a word. “(Y/N)? Did you hear what I just said?”

_“Hm?”_

Camille sighs, “Just what I thought so.” Then she chuckles to herself, “Say, I heard that _eyebrow guy_ came to visit you few days back.”

“Huh?” (Y/N) finally snaps back to reality as she takes a bite off a pancake. “Oh, yeah. He did, along with friends.”

Margot who was just listening to the whole ordeal finally speaks up, “Mom? Who is this you’re calling _eyebrow guy?_ ”

“Oh, he’s my new squad leader, Erwin Smith.”

Margot scrunches up her nose as she tries to remember where she heard his name the first time, “Is that the same scout you were with when I met you at the park last time?”

 _“Last time?”_ (Y/N) then explains to Camille that they just stopped by for an important work matter. “How come you didn’t come around then? I could’ve baked some stuff for you guys to take.”

(Y/N) was quick to dismiss the topic by shrugging her shoulders. She was now thinking of the stuff she wanted to do for the day. Excitedly, she rushes to finish her food and placed her plate down the sink. It seemed like her arm has fully recovered while her head wouldn’t take long now as well. Pouring herself a cup of tea, she peeks through the window and felt like it was surely a day she couldn’t miss. She hisses to herself when she burned the tip of her tongue trying to drink as fast as she could.

“Slow down! What are you in such a hurry for?” The other woman cautions her while giving her a confused chuckle.

“I don’t know yet, but I’m going out. I just haven’t felt this good in such a long time.” Her eyes gleamed in genuine happiness, even Camille thought it was a refreshing sight on her sister-in-law. “It feels like… it feels like _someone’s_ calling me to come out and have fun…? Have you ever felt that before?”

Now all Camille could do is smile, “I can’t tell, but I’m glad you’re enjoying your break.”

She hurriedly takes a shower and slipped on comfortable clothes she can wear out. Margot then asks (Y/N) if she could walk with her to school to which she obliged. The two went out soon as they said goodbye to Camille.

As they walked past the houses, Margot tells (Y/N) that she was excited to see Jean and Marco after their camp as they were both expected to be back in school today. She intently listens to her niece as she looks up to the tall trees and birds flying by.

“ _Hmm,_ Auntie? I almost forgot to tell you something.”

(Y/N) smiles down to her as she clutches her hand, “What is it, sweetie?”

“I also made friends with a new neighbor!”

“What’re they like?”

“I think he’s the same age as you.” She asked her why and how they became friends, and the young girl felt even more excited to tell her about him. “He _kinda_ scared off those mean boys who were bullying me one time. He looks strict, but I think you’d have fun if you met him.”

The two arrived at the gates of the school, letting go of Margot’s hand, (Y/N) crouches to her niece’s eye level and pats her shoulder. “Then, I’m excited to meet this new friend.”

 _“Margot!”_ Two familiar voices call the girl from behind and she was quick to jump in their arms. The three waved at (Y/N) as she tells them to have fun for the day.

* * *

_Eyes twitching, fingers tapping the table, and staring into the open space._ Levi was used to his insomnia worsening for at least a week every month, but he didn’t quite enjoy staying up last night either. The next-door neighbors had a party with a loud crowd that lasted all night; and when he thought it was dying down, their baby enjoyed crying very loudly for the rest of the hours. Normally, he would’ve been very pissed off, enough to confront them at the very moment their child started wailing, but neither of them would’ve had enough energy to argue anyway.

Levi had been in the kitchen for a good three hours because of the noise, but muffled voices could still be heard even from there. Instead of desperately trying to close his eyes and hopefully fall asleep, he heats up some water to just start brewing tea. _Sleep isn’t much of an option at this time now that the sun is slowly creeping up in the sky,_ he thought.

After finishing a kettle of his favorite black tea, he stands up and stretches his back and arms which gave sounds of satisfying cracks. He immediately washes his tea set and proceeded to clean the kitchen and the rest of the house. Levi always has enough energy to clean his surroundings whether he’s insomniac or not.

When he felt satisfied with the chores done, he went in for a warm shower and thought about other things he might do today. He thought about checking shops in the town center and maybe find some things to buy; maybe new clothes or a pair of shoes, literally whatever he thinks he might need. By the time he finished showering and went into his bedroom to grab clothes, the wailing had finally stopped.

The sun shines from a small window down the hallway that illuminated the whole place. Judging by how the warmth felt on his bare skin when he passed by, he let out a small smile on his lips. It was going to be a good day.

Levi hurried to go outside and enjoy while the weather was perfect. People were also walking down the street, presumably going to work, while some held their children’s hands on their way to school. Passing by the familiar house, he saw his blonde neighbor tending to her small garden outside. He planned on just passing by quietly, as he wasn’t in the mood for early morning chitchats.

 _“Good morning, Levi!”_ He stops right in his tracks and turns around to the woman who left her work and stood up, “Off to somewhere?”

“Good morning, Camille.” he says in the most monotonous voice he could let out. “Yes, I’m off to _run errands._ ”

Camille laughs apologetically and just went straight to her point. “ _Oh, my bad!_ Sorry to hold you any longer, but before I forget, would you like to come by for lunch on Sunday? My husband’s coming home just in time for his birthday. Y’know, it’ll also give you a chance to meet our other neighbors.”

Levi wasn’t one for parties, taking into consideration his experience from last night. “I’m not entirely sure if I could come.” He could see her small frown when he said it, and apparently, she was too kind to even invite someone like him, “But I’ll try.”

* * *

_My nightmarish days came to an end_

_when I dreamt of you holding my hand_

She absent-mindedly writes in her pad, it wasn’t the prettiest choice of words, but it was a sentence she kept in mind for some time now.

When (Y/N) arrived at the town center, she was immediately attracted by the hanging signboard across the street that led to the library. She hasn’t picked up a new book in a while and was wanting to read a new one. She brisk walks towards the doors and felt nostalgic the moment she opened the doors, and the scent of old and new books engulfed the place.

Although _cliché,_ young love novels weren’t normally suited for her taste, she found a book that instantly drawn her to open and read the first few pages and eventually half the book. She found herself giggling when the main characters who have an established love-hate relationship started to develop fondness for each other. (Y/N) couldn’t help but put herself in the shoes of one of them, and it sure does fit very well.

The story finds the main character doing the best she can to survive a hellish life, and out of nowhere, a very unlikely man arrives. When (Y/N) finally understood the plot, she got the idea to write a small poetic piece she hopes to finish someday.

She finds herself thinking about Levi again as she stared outside the glass window right in front of her. _Is he doing well? Is he not troubled by everything that has happened? I hope he hasn’t beaten himself up over those tragic events the same way I have done with myself._

Just as she was going to pick up where she left off with the book, she notices a reflection on the glass that made her blink twice.

_Levi?_

But when she looked back to the shelves, no one stood there apart from a few girls and staff who’s rearranging the books. She couldn’t have been wrong about that; she just saw the black-haired guy flip through another copy of the book she was reading. To prove herself right, she immediately grabbed her stuff and went to the counter to sign on borrowing the book.

“ _Uhm_ excuse me, but is there any chance that a black-haired man who’s about as tall as me, borrowed a book just now?”

The old woman adjusts her glasses as she tries to remember, “ _Hmm,_ yes darling! He actually borrowed three books and one of them is this one you’re reading.” She points to the direction where she thought she could’ve headed. (Y/N) thanks sweet woman and runs outside the library hoping to catch up with the man.

She didn’t realize just how many hours it’s been since she went to read, the crowd was growing thicker and it was even harder to see through the bright sun. Using the book to give her some shade just above her eyes, she saw the man heading towards the produce market. She speeds off to follow and muttered a few apologies to everyone she passed by and possibly nudged to the side. When she got about a few steps behind him, she felt her flush knowing that it might be Levi, well, the man resembled him so much from behind.

She steps forward but then…

_“Step aside!”_

A loud voice alerts everyone on the street as a number of carriages and wagons passed. It took time before the street cleared and she certainly lost track of the man.

Maybe she was just imagining things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR'S EVE EVERYONE (it's already 31 from where I'm from)!!! I know it's been a really tough year, and I wish everyone's ending it with hopes of better days in 2021*fingers crossed* :)))
> 
> I'm just thankful for the ao3 and aot/snk community because both really helped me get through 2020 by pushing me to write this fanfic <333 Thanks for all the support you've given this story ever since ch1!!!


	16. The Party

“Happy birthday, Pierre!” (Y/N) hugs her brother tightly and plastered a big smile against his chest, she looks up smugly which confuses him, “I almost forgot just how _old_ you have become!”

Pierre rolls his eyes as he lets go of his younger sister, “Shut up, I’m only twenty-nine! Stop exaggerating.” He replaces the annoyance on his face with a more comforted one, “But thank you, _thanks for being here._ ” Even when the man already has his own family, seeing his sister alive, in a bright mood, and not worrying about her dreams will always be among the precious things in life that he treasures. He may not be very good at showing affection, but he tries his best. He ruffles her hair which left her equally as annoyed because she took the time to fix it.

Margot comes inside the kitchen to drag her dad into the living room to show him a picture she’s drawn. (Y/N) sits back down and helps in peeling and cutting the ingredients for all the food they had to cook, Camille places them in separate pots depending on the dish.

“So, are you really not staying any longer here?” Camille plans to insist on having her sister-in-law stay so she could finally meet and interact with the man she’s been meaning to introduce. “You’re not exactly going back to the headquarters anytime soon, right?”

(Y/N) pauses, to be honest, she’s slowing starting to get convinced by Camille, “ _Uhm,_ actually about that…” She sighs, trying to be concrete with her decisions, “I plan on going back as soon as possible, I just need to have some stuff done before I’ll be gone again for who knows how long.”

“Fine, but I’ve seen just how much you’ve improved these past few days… I don’t wanna see you get back to being stressed and occupied so early on.” Camille continues to get the pots heated on top of the fire, not bothering to stop while keeping the conversation going. “Are you even sure that you’ve recovered enough to get moving again?”

(Y/N) shrugs, as she starts focusing on peeling the last of the potatoes, “If I wasn’t itching to go back so much, maybe I haven’t.”

She could hear the woman sigh in defeat, and once she turns back to the table, she grips Camille’s hand in reassurance. “Look, I get that you’re concerned about me not taking care of myself well enough and getting unnecessarily upset over bad dreams, and I’m grateful for that, honestly. But trust me, I am trying my best to change that. I don’t want to have to rely on you so much especially now that you’re expecting.”

“I really _hate_ the fact that you put other’s well-being over yours all the time,” Camille smiles apologetically and squeezes (Y/N)’s hand in return. “But if things, especially your dreams, get overwhelming again, the post is always open.”

(Y/N) chuckles, Camille really is the sister she never had, she’s thankful Pierre married a woman as kind as her.

A few moments later, friends of Camille and Pierre, who were mostly neighbors, started to come to the house. The women lend hands to both Camille and (Y/N) in the kitchen so that more work will be done while the men, who were out in the large space behind had cheered on for their friend before helping him set a large tent. (Y/N) convinced Camille that she was fine enough to help them outside by lifting tables and other arrangements, but before she could get outside the kitchen, Camille warns her not to force herself if it was too exhausting.

“After all, Pierre’s friends can probably handle it too, you know?”

(Y/N) chuckles and smiles in assurance and went through the back door. About ten men were there outside; most of them were putting the tables in place while Pierre and three more were confused with how they should set up the tent.

“Need any help?” (Y/N) politely approaches Pierre’s friends whom she’s never met before.

The oldest of the four looks at her and huffs almost rudely, “No, thank you. Ladies like you might get hurt! _And make it longer for us to set this up._ ”

(Y/N) raises a brow at his remark but kept her cool. “Oh, is that so?” She smiles, “Guess I’ll be off.”

The man continues to erect a pole on the ground and fails, multiple times. Pierre’s shoots a look at (Y/N) telling her to just help out. She sighs and chuckles, “You haven’t even attached the poles to the joints, how do you think that’s gonna stand?”

The man turns red in embarrassment, “Well… I was… going to do _just_ that.” (Y/N) grabs one of the wooden poles then attaches it to a metal joint. While Pierre and two other men went ahead to do the same thing on the other poles, one was left behind and observed as she moved.

“Hmm, if it were me, I wouldn’t let a lady ruin her _precious_ hands.” He says with a strong flirtatious tone that made her cringe internally.

She huffs, not bothering to take her eyes off what she was doing, “I hate to disappoint you, but these hands are terribly calloused and that’s not even the worst I have.”

“My, isn’t it hard to find a man with the way you treat yourself? I heard you are also a part of the Survey Corps, that’s very _unladylike._ ” (Y/N) stands up and inches closer to the man, he may be taller, but she showed no signs of inferiority against him.

“Well, I have no interest in what men like _you_ find beautiful in a woman. Now, if you’ll excuse me.” Her intense glare and polite tone would’ve put anyone in their place. However, when she starts to leave, the man follows her tracks, obviously trying to illicit some interest from the girl.

He blocks her way which really annoyed her even further, but her eye-rolling didn’t seem to put him off when arrogantly puts his hands back on the pockets of his coat and plasters a cocky look on his face. “But a woman with a strong attitude is what I am inclined to, how come Pierre never introduced me to you before?”

She smiles, “My brother would’ve known what’s best for me. Now, if you have nothing else to say, I suggest you take your leave. That is, if you don’t wanna know how easily these _calloused_ hands can take a man down to the ground.”

He didn’t show any signs of defeat by the way he smiled before turning his back, but (Y/N) could hear him mutter a few curse words under his breath. When she glanced to see what her brother was up to, Pierre gives her a thumbs up and mouths, _“Everything okay?”_ to which she replies with a wink a thumbs up.

* * *

_“What the fuck am I supposed to wear?”_ Levi curses himself as he rummages through the hanged and folded clothes in his closet. Just by looking at the color scheme of his wardrobe, his options were limited. Whatever he’d wear, it’d look like he was about to attend a funeral. He sighs before closing the door and is then met by his own reflection from the mirror attached to it. If he had so little choices for an appropriate outfit, the expressions he’d show on his face were even less.

_“How the fuck am I supposed to look like?”_

His insomnia wasn’t getting any better at all; the biggest amount of _undisturbed_ sleep he could get is when his body starts to get soaked during his cold showers. It leaves him annoyed when he’s awoken by the water getting too warm or when he remembers he hasn’t gathered the laundry on the clothesline from yesterday’s washing.

He considers not going, like he’s been doing ever since Camille invited him. Or maybe he could just drop by to tell them he couldn’t stay long and just give them a bottle of wine as a gift. And after thinking about it for quite some time, he chooses the latter.

Grabbing his newest set of clothes, he carefully slips them on to not wrinkle the fabric. Levi unconsciously tilts his head as he examines the way the grayish shirt accentuated most of his chest and arms, he thought he must’ve chosen a size quite smaller than one’s he’d usually wear. Either way, he was a bit disappointed with his lack of skill in choosing outfits that would work regardless of the occasion; he believes he must get better at it, otherwise, people would think of him as bland or boring.

 _But since when did he give a fuck about what others thought of him?_ Not a faintest memory came to his mind. So, he shrugs and grabbed the blazer before tying his cravat around the collar of his shirt.

He leaves his room and check out the small balcony he just found a few days back, the door on its way was barely noticeable especially that the light couldn’t reach much of the space. He dusts off the railing before leaning his arms against it, surprised at how much dust has settled after cleaning the place earlier. Tents with people walking in and out and children running around the field was visible from where he stood, but one particular view made him blink twice.

_It’s her again._

The same day he was invited for lunch, he finally checked out the library Margot mentioned to him. When he went inside, he felt strangely comforted. The atmosphere immediately made him loosen up and went ahead to check the numerous shelves that lined up. He picked up a couple books that to him were educational and sat on a nearby table. He was completely immersed with every page, considering there’s so much he has to know about the world he’s now living in.

When his eyes felt strained, he closes the book and glances at the others sitting on the long stretch of tables by the windows. About five seats away from him sat a girl that was practically turning her back against him, but he could see that she was just as deep into reading as he was few moments ago by the way she slams her free palm ever so silently every now and then.

Absurdly, he could picture (Y/N) doing the same thing. _Could it be that it was indeed her?_

Maybe he was wrong. It’s probably just because his eyes hurt from all that reading.

But of course, it wouldn’t probably hurt to check out closer.

He pretends to skim through the _tasteless,_ young love books on the shelf behind the girl who just closed her book a few moments ago and picked up a pencil and a pad. The color of her hair certainly matched hers, as far as he could remember. He then realized that he could see much of her reflection from the window in front, and he felt his heart leap when her head moved to look ahead as well.

He walks quickly to the front desk to check out, quite forgetting to place back that shitty book on the shelf, but he wasn’t going to go back there and risk getting called out for staring at a woman from behind for too long.

And now, Levi’s become more intrigued to go to the party, he went ahead and brought his gift to the neighbor’s house. When he was in the vicinity, he was met by the noises of the crowd which from his guess, was terribly huge.

He steps back, thinking maybe going there wasn’t a good idea after all. He might just come back some-

“Levi! You came!” That cheery child’s voice came rushing to him along with two other kids.

He shakes his head, ready to make up some lousy excuse. “Actually I won’t-“

“Wait, I’ll tell mom you’re here.”

And with that, Margot and her friends left once more.

Levi awkwardly stood outside as everyone else was passing by here and there, possibly busy with the preparations. It might good time to just drop by since it didn’t look like the celebrations were starting soon.

_“Excuse me..."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I might update chapter 17 very soon! Stay tuned <3


	17. We Meet Again

She falters as she takes a small step back. Skeptic to what she was seeing in front of her right now, she tries blinking a few times just to confirm that it just wasn’t because of the sun. The man in front slightly tilts his head to the side, possibly wondering as to why she’d react the way she did — as if she’d seen a ghost.

Her mouth opened and closed with hesitation; of course, he may or may have not crossed her mind _few_ times these past days. “L-Levi?”

“(Y/N) …” His face showed indifference to seeing her again, but the way his voice was lower than usual seems to suggest otherwise.

Raising an eyebrow, she tries to look as calm as he did. “How- Why- What are you doing here?” And failed rather miserably. Levi shrugs and shows her the bottle in his hand that had a small ribbon tied on its neck. He really is on a different level of cool that she just couldn’t reach without trying so hard.

“Camille invited me here, she says it’s her husband’s birthday…?” _Does he live around here? How did Camille get connections with people like him?_

She pouts and nods, “Well- “

“Oh, there you are! I guess you’ve met my sister-in-law, (Y/N)!” Camille approaches the two and waves at Levi. She seemed the most enthusiastic about the whole encounter, “Remember when I told you I was going to introduce a guy to you, (Y/N)? Well, it turns out we’ve got a new one in the neighborhood. You’re not actually seeing someone else right now, are you?” She swore she saw Levi’s slight change in his expression the moment her sister-in-law reconfirms her status.

(Y/N) shakes her head and chuckles, “ _No,_ of course not. It’s just that- “

“We already know each other.” Levi continues, all she could do was smile and nod in accord. Taking a glance at him, the stern expression was changed into a more relieved one. Not that she thinks Levi would put his nose in on matters like this, but there was something about the way he reacted to her disagreeing to Camille’s assumption.

Camille’s mouth was left wide open at the new information she’s heard, “Wait, you’re from the Survey Corps too?!” Levi nods, which put a huge smile in the woman’s face. “What a _small_ world we live in, don’t you think?”

“ _Duh,_ we live inside walls, after all.” (Y/N) jokingly rolls her eyes at the woman to which she replied with a _“Can’t expect to know everyone, still.”_

Camille, seemingly satisfied with how the _introduction_ turned out, places her hands out as if she was offering something. “I guess I’ll leave you two to it!” She winks as she waves and disappears to the opposite direction before any of them could say anything else. Even in the warm breeze, she felt her nape and cheeks grow hot.

_“Don’t be awkward, (Y/N).”_ She exhales quite loudly before facing the man who stood there just as clueless to what he should do next.

She tilts her head ever so slightly, “I heard you tell Margot you weren’t staying long?”

“Oh, no. I just thought I was just… _awfully early._ ” She lets out a small sigh of relief, which came out as a surprise even to her. Surely Levi must’ve noticed it too. “I… can always come back later.”

She knew she wouldn’t mind if he left, _but did it feel nice to know he’s here to stay longer?_

Glancing at a window revealing a portion of the inside of the house, (Y/N) felt grateful everyone was already out in the back by that time. She halts him from going anywhere else by reaching out to his free hand. “Why don’t you wait inside while I look for something clean to wear? Don’t worry, it’s quiet.” If she read him right, Levi didn’t quite like the hubbubs, and it looked unlikely for him to be at least familiar with the other guests either.

He silently follows suit; it took a while for her to notice just how cold his skin was even when he stood for who knows how long under the sun, so she lets go and offers him a seat in one sofa in the living room.

“Make yourself at home,” She walks quickly up the stairs before turning back, _“Won’t be long!”_

Closing the door behind her, she jumps headfirst to her bed and muffled her squeal under a pillow. She indeed just wasn’t thinking so hard about him, he _really_ was there in places where she’d see a black-haired man with his cravat stand out in the crowd. She _really_ hasn’t gone crazy yet.

She stands in front of the mirror and practiced how she’d keep her composure in front of him. Thinking of how she’d act in front of him back when they were in the headquarters, (Y/N) tries reenacting them, but miserably failed. It bothers her that Levi hasn’t said anything to her that would make her blood boil yet; he was rather soft spoken and now she couldn’t even reciprocate it without feeling slightly awkward.

Sighing, _“It’ll be fine, (Y/N).”_ She grabs the cream-colored lace up dress she’s never worn in a long time. Trying it on, she subconsciously asks herself of what _he’d_ think when she goes back down. She cringes at the thought and quickly finishes preparing herself to shake off whatever this new feeling was.

Taking one more glance in the mirror, she smiles, maybe her outfit would always look good on her regardless of what everyone else thought.

“I’m all set,” she says loud enough for him to hear and immediately stand up. He didn’t notice her come to the living room as he looked down and straightened his shirt and pants. When he did look up, Levi looked dumbfounded at the sight. She smiles as she eyes him from head to toe, “I must say, you look good in that. I wasn’t able to appreciate it when we were out because of the sun. The flowers are definitely a nice touch.”

“Thanks, you look good today too. Margot just came here to give these to us.” Unprompted, Levi takes the other crown and places it carefully on her head, trying not to ruin her hairstyle, “The flowers are _definitely_ a nice touch.”

That was a surprise. At that very moment, her heart beat loud enough she swore she felt her temples pulsate, even more now that their eyes locked. When the crown was set in place, few strands of her hair fell on her face. He was quick to push them back behind her ear, cold fingers made her flinch at the touch.

He retracts, “Sorry, did you like it better before?” He must’ve thought she moved because she refused to have her hair touched. She chuckles at the thought of him getting genuinely confused all while shaking her head no.

“Your hands, they’re too cold.”

“Oh.”

They went out to join everyone else outside. Most of the people were already in their seats, ready to have the feast. Camille calls out to them and points to the seats she’s reserved for them beside hers. Levi tags along as they approach the man who sat beside her sister-in-law; he softly clears his throat when they neared the long table. The guests all shared their glances at the two and found something to talk about seconds later. (Y/N) still felt eyes burning behind their backs, if it was uncomfortable enough for her, Levi would’ve felt worse. So, she turns back to him and smiles in reassurance, _“Don’t mind them.”_

“Pierre! I’d like you to meet my friend from the Corps.” The man turns to them and smiled ever so brightly. He also wore a flower crown like the two of them, only that it was even more extravagant looking. She walks a step back so the two men are now facing each other. “This is Levi. Levi, this is my only brother, Pierre.”

They both shake hands and then Levi offers Pierre the bottle he’s been holding for the longest time. “Happy Birthday, I got this bottle of wine as a gift for you.” Pierre gladly accepts and was genuinely impressed when he read the label on it.

“ _My, my,_ I already like you, man!” Pierre pats Levi’s shoulder as (Y/N) and Camille watched them interact. “You’ve got excellent taste! I bet we’re gonna be _really good_ friends.”

Camille takes the bottle from her husband and places it on the table, “You shouldn’t go around stealing other people’s best friends, darling.”

“Come on, sweetie. A friend of (Y/N) is a friend of mine. _Unless…_ ” Pierre shoots a suspecting look at the shorter man, and (Y/N) was quick to dismiss anything he thought of by swatting his arm. “ _What?!_ I haven’t said anything yet!”

Pierre offers a handshake with Levi and did so firmly, “Well then, enjoy the party!”

Completely ignoring anything else Pierre has to say, (Y/N) offers a Levi a seat to her right. She was quick to notice the empty seat on her left which was strange considering everyone’s enjoying the dishes served on the table. Taking her mind off of it, she playfully nudges Levi and told him not to get shy while eating.

“Now that’s what a _proper_ lady looks like,” The same man from earlier comes to sit on the empty chair beside her; out of all the places he could’ve stayed, it had to be the one closest to her. If the way he talked was already putting her off, the fact that he reeked of alcohol was just making it worse. She shifts slightly closer to Levi to which he immediately noticed. Levi gives her a concerned look on his face that she only dismissed with a smile.

Throughout the whole course, Pierre and Camille asked Levi questions about himself which he only gave vague answers to. Of course, the couple understood that he may not be comfortable talking about personal topics and so they proceeded to playfully exposing (Y/N) by telling him the way she once punched a kid bullying Pierre when they were younger and how everyone else got scared of her afterwards. She felt embarrassed by the way Levi smiled at Pierre’s recounting of that memory. But unlike the three of them who are more immersed in the conversation, (Y/N) was frequently disturbed by the other man’s accidental nudging to her side. It was clear that she’s finally irritated, but she obviously didn’t want to make a scene. She inches closer and closer to Levi who didn’t seem to mind, but he didn’t look like he understood why either.

One of Pierre’s _better_ friends stood to the front with a glass of white wine in his hand. He clinks it with a spoon just enough to get everyone’s attention.

“A pleasant noon to everyone here, as everyone may have known, a special man is celebrating his special day today. Our dearest Pierre, happy birthday to you.” He raises his glass to the direction of his very best friend to which all his other close friends loudly cheered. “Now, I am not very good at making speeches. I just want to say, that on behalf of all our friends, we are grateful to have you in our lives. Now please don’t cry,” Everyone laughed before he could continue, “I can’t recall the last time you looked decent while wailing.” He approaches Pierre in his seat and the two shared a tight hug before he went back to the front.

“There is also another special person in his life who might want to share a few words. She’s a very busy person, so we’re taking this as a rare opportunity. (Y/N), would you please come in front?”

Pierre sarcastically opens his mouth in shock and pretends to wipe a tear off his eye. (Y/N) on the other hand, was just confused; she wasn’t oriented to give any speech at all. But seeing that everyone’s eyes were on her now, she slowly stands up and smiles awkwardly as she walks to the front with her own wine glass in hand.

“ _Uhm,_ first and foremost, I’d like to thank everyone for making this special day a great one for my brother. I know just how hardworking and busy you’ve been in the past weeks and you really deserve to be celebrated.” She finds her eyes glancing at Levi’s direction, he was anticipating for her next words which made her slightly relieved.

“Pierre, I am very lucky to have you for a brother. I just don’t know where I’d be right now if I didn’t have anyone who’s as kind, grounded, yet outspoken as you growing up with. I know you hate it when I say this, but I _see_ Mom in you. And if she saw how you’ve become now, she’d be proud too.”

She felt her lips tremble as she said those words. Trying to loosen the constriction she felt in her throat, she exhales heavily. “I hope you’ll have a wonderful year and life ahead of you, because that’s what you deserve. Happy birthday, Pierre.” Everyone applauded and raised their glasses with her as she finished her speech.

When she went back to her place, Pierre hugged her so tightly that she could feel herself sink in her brother’s arms. He genuinely was touched by (Y/N)’s comparison between him and their mother whom he missed so dearly. _“I wish dad was here to hear you not bullying me for once,”_ he mutters under his breath with a hint of disappointment for the absence of their father.

“Yeah, I guess he’s missed his only chance.” She shrugs as she lets go and return to her seat. However, when she neared, Levi swapped seats with her so that he was the one sitting next to that drunk man.

The man glares at Levi because of his actions. “Hey, _Missy_ and I were still holding a conversation, do you mind?”

“ _Tch,_ she says she didn’t know you two were talking.” He bluntly replies as he turns his back on the man and moved closer to ask. _“You alright? You looked extremely bothered earlier.”_

She smiles, “Yeah, thank you.” Her cheeks started growing hot once more as she showed appreciation for him noticing. She was surprised that he also took note of how she felt even when he was talking to the others.

“That was pretty emotional, I would say.” He sips what was left of his wine as (Y/N) chuckled at his compliment, she prepares to playfully brag about it by dramatically placing a hand on her chest and pouted.

“Did it _touch_ your heart? That was impromptu, by the way.”

“I could tell.”

* * *

The festivities were still going even after sundown. Everyone gathered around the fire and danced to the music played by the neighborhood band. Levi was contented with sitting on the sidelines along with a few others. (Y/N) was nowhere to be found, she probably was just deep in the crowd, he thought.

But every time he felt someone moved or walked past, he subconsciously glances and would feel a slight disappointment when he guesses wrong. Of course, he wasn’t exactly _looking_ for her, _was he?_

_No, of course not._ He just feels slightly better at the thought of seeing someone he knew better than everyone else among the large crowd, _doesn’t he?_

_Of course,_ that is the _only reason_ he had.

He forces himself to stop glancing to the corners of his eyes by focusing on the bright fire that burned in front of him. But before he could fully distract himself, some woman accidentally spills a small portion of the drink she held as she danced. Levi stood up and walked quickly to their kitchen to rinse off the drink from his shirt before it completely seeps in and stains. _“Ah, shit.”_

As he enters the back door that led to the kitchen, he hears a man and a woman’s voice.

_“You can’t possibly turn down a man like me!”_ The man slurred through his words, and that’s when Levi realized that he must be tipsy – drunk even.

The woman gives a sarcastic chuckle. _“Well actually, I can. And I just did.”_

Levi recognizes both voices and decided to listen a little longer on what happens next.

_“Oh, come on. I promise we’re just going to talk, drink tea, and then you can go home.”_

_“No.”_

_“No? Don’t make me look desperate here.”_

_“You are making yourself look desperate. Once again, I am not interested.”_

_“But- “_

Levi sighs as he enters the room and leans on the doorframe. “What part of ‘no’ makes it hard for you to understand?” He shoots the man a look that easily put him off. He unwillingly stumbles away while (Y/N) returns to placing the plates in the cupboard. Levi walks towards the sink beside her and washed his hands. He realized that he forgot about the big dumb stain on his shirt, and it’s completely dried on the fabric.

“How long has he been pestering you?”

“The whole damn day.” He could feel the annoyance in her voice. So far, this has been the closest he’s heard of her talk the way she used to when they were in the headquarters. “Apparently, he’s Pierre’s coworker whom he was just forced to invite because he thought it’d be a shame to leave only him behind.”

He shrugs, “Your brother’s too kind.” She arranges the plates too loudly Levi was surprised none of them broke, she then looks at him with so much frustration as she agrees.

“ _Ugh, too_ kind, exactly!” She takes a moment to exhale and let out what remained of her anger. Her expression turned softer as she closes the cupboard and leaned on the counter. “Glad you came around. Why exactly did you come in anyway?”

Levi points to his shirt, “Well, I need to go back home and change. I’ll be back later.”

“Wait! No…” She glances to the window which showed everyone slowly getting exhausted after all that dancing, then her eyes were back to him, gleaming.

“I don’t wanna go back out, can't I... just hang out with you?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been really writing so much these past weeks, most likely because I am so attached to AOT/SNK especially to the Vets that I want to make a run for all this inspiration before the whole series ends (i am up to date with the manga and anime) and I break my heart and lose the will to do anything right after (i do hope that wouldn't be the case but i believe that because of how this impacted my life, the finale will really affect me emotionally and mentally).
> 
> I hope the whole series ends well, and by well, I mean like the ending would be well-written. Even if shit happens.
> 
> ALSO, I am super grateful for all the kudos and hits this book has gotten so far! Thank you so much for all the support! I hope you add this to your bookmarks! <333


	18. Gone Soft

“Sure.”

There was an abrupt silence between the two. Levi saw just how tired she was and how she probably didn’t enjoy the party very much. He too would gladly have left the place if it weren’t for _her._

Her eyes shined even brighter and a smile plasters on her face. “You mean it?”

 _“Mhm,”_ He nods, trying to look as indifferent as he can while she looks at him like a child given sweets. He turns around to leave the kitchen and towards the front door. When he opened it, he was met by the cool evening breeze that was enough to lift his cravat out of place. He could hear her footsteps with the soft clinking of bottles as she followed.

She smiles at him as she waves the liquor in her hands, “Two bottles won’t hurt, right?”

Levi turns back to the view of the neighborhood and they both step out into the street which was illuminated by a few torches. Levi led the way while (Y/N) strutted behind, humming. Looking back to her, her untroubled expression as she looked down to her steps was fairly visible under the orange light. When she noticed him staring, she turned flustered before smiling once more.

The nearby noise of music playing and people cheering started to fade, and he could better hear her humming along with a few crickets chirping in the distance.

This was truly the most tranquil moment he’s ever experienced in such a long time. Especially with how things took for a spin recently. And what made it even more relaxing was the look on her face.

There’s only so little he knew about her but seeing just what she went through, was devastating.

_“Hey Levi, thank you for coming. We appreciate it a lot.” Camille takes both of his hands and smiled at him almost tearfully._

_Confused as to why she’d put such meaning in him turning up to her invitation, he just shrugs. “Don’t mention it- “_

_“No, really. I wanted to thank you personally for coming, even when you said you weren’t sure. You don’t know how much it means to us.”_

_Levi could only look at her and mentally ask why. Camille looks to (Y/N) in the distance who was playing with Margot and her friends in the grassy field. She pretends to fall to the ground along with the children with so much happiness, even the soft afternoon winds blew her faint, hearty laughter towards their direction._

_“I have never seen (Y/N) this happy until she saw you earlier. I mean, she’s been trying to not get sad as much as possible. But it felt like it wasn’t genuine like something was missing.” She chuckles to herself as she lets go of his hands and covered her mouth with hers. “Now, I don’t know what it is that you two have, but by the way you acted around each other, it sure was delightful.”_

_The moment Camille left to attend to the other guests, (Y/N) looked to him, must be curious about whatever they talked about. Even with how far she was, he could see her bright smile under the setting sun as she waves her arms high._

_He didn’t respond. He couldn’t seem to wrap his head around the fact that he just might be the reason why every time he looked at her, she seemed to shine so much brighter than the sun itself. That every time she laughed heartily, the sound echoes in his mind over and over again. That every time he got even the smallest sight of her eyes, they were twinkling, like the stars, he saw the first night he came to the surface._

_She stopped waving and pouted, thinking Levi must not have noticed. At the same moment, his heart sank when he remembered the way he must’ve subconsciously insulted her with his words just so he could keep his façade. With the way she moved without the slightest hint of pain, what was it that he could’ve done that outweighed all the bullshit he’s caused?_

“Is something wrong, Levi?”

“What?” He snaps out of his thoughts when she moved in front of him.

She giggled when she saw just how confused he looked, “You suddenly just stopped walking, are you alright?” He didn’t even realize that he did stop in his tracks, barely missing the path towards his doorstep. He doesn’t say anything, but just walked up to his door and felt the pockets of his blazer and pants for his keys. Finally opening the door, he halts (Y/N) so he could light the lamps first.

“You can come in now,” He hurries to the kitchen and stripped off his stained shirt, and run some water in it. Fortunately, the stain was fading as he softly scrubs the area with his fingers. He was hurrying to clean it up when he felt colder wind brushing his skin, especially on his back. He wondered what the (H/C) was up to in his living room when suddenly he heard footsteps.

“Say, do you have a corkscrew? I can’t pull- _Oh._ ” Levi realizes he hasn’t put a new shirt on and was literally topless in front of her. He quickly turns his back on her and faced the sink. Maybe he should’ve just used the bathroom.

“So, do you have one?”

He was almost impressed at her nonchalance that he turned back to her again and pointed to the cupboard behind her. He also finished washing his shirt the same moment she found the corkscrew and opened one bottle. He hangs the wet shirt outside and went back in to see her wait at the dinner table.

“I won’t drink until you’re done.” She says as Levi walks up the stairs to change.

* * *

While waiting for Levi to come back down, (Y/N) stood up to look around the place. Fortunately, his house was spacious enough that the light from the lamps reached as far as they could. What really took her attention was the small pile of books on his coffee table in the living room. Looking back to where he went up, it didn’t look like he’ll finish anytime soon. A shocked look was plastered on her face when she saw that the book on top was the very same one she read in the library that day.

 _“So it really was him,”_ She says to herself as she picks it up and sits closest to the lamp. She tries to remember the exact page she was on with the copy she had borrowed and flipped through it. Rereading a few paragraphs so she’d remember, Levi brought the bottles from the kitchen and settled them on the table. He sits on the armchair adjacent to the sofa she was on and offered the other bottle to her. After taking a swig, she accidentally chuckles that almost choked her.

Levi, who felt very comfortable in his own home by crossing his legs and spanned his arms on the armchair, looks to her, weirded out. “What’s so funny?”

“It’s just that,” She feels the edges of the covers with her fingers. “I didn’t think you were one for romantic pieces.”

He shrugs, “That book’s pretty shit, to be honest.” She felt like she was talking to the Levi she’d usually see at that moment. “Just from the introduction, I could tell it’s disappointing.” She couldn’t really find anything to rebut his statement. She hands him back the book and the way he looked down on the pages reminded her of how she unmistakably saw him at the library.

Seeing that he wasn’t the slightest bit of tensed as he usually is, (Y/N) takes the opportunity to hold a conversation that is light-hearted at the very least. Both unknowingly sipped from their bottles at the same time; and elicited a rather awkward atmosphere in the room — even more so that Levi probably was expecting a word or two from her to keep their interaction going. After all, she was the one who wanted to join him and asked to drink with him.

“So, _uhm…_ ” She clears her throat and shifts ever so slightly in her seat. Levi immediately turns his attention to her, waiting to finish what she had to say. “I wasn’t able to hang out with you so much earlier, sorry about that. Did you have fun?”

He nods modestly which made her feel relieved. “I just didn’t expect that a lot of people would show up. Your family’s quite popular around this place, huh.”

“ _Their_ family, yeah. I was just as surprised myself; I only come by this place when our schedule has a small room for a break. And besides, my dad wanted me to finish my recovery someplace where I wasn’t alone.” Levi just sat there and listened while (Y/N) was thinking of some other things to say to keep the conversation going. “How have you been?”

“So far, alive.”

“Is that all you have to say?” She laughs sarcastically, she wanted to dig deeper, but she has literally no idea how she would know more of the man without overstepping boundaries. So, she sighs, “Well, that’s good to know.”

She just noticed that Levi was eyeing the bottle she had in her hand and nodded, seemingly convinced. “I assume you’re all well, considering how quickly you finished your drink.” She looks at the bottle which was now empty except for a few drops.

She mutters a small ‘oh’ before placing the object on the table, it has been quite some time since she got a taste of any beverage other than water. She felt slightly embarrassed at the fact that she could down a whole bottle if she wanted to, “I guess this was over too soon.”

Levi had finished his own too, down to the last drop. He stands up, takes the empty bottles, and disappears into the kitchen. When he returned, he had three bottles on each hand that he carefully grasped with his large hands. He sets them all down and waves his hand in a manner that was as if he was presenting the liquor to her. “Help yourself.”

“A few more wouldn’t hurt,” She says, referencing her own statement from earlier.

* * *

Six turned to eight, and eight turned to ten. It surprised Levi just how far (Y/N) was still going, considering she only seemed to be an occasional drinker, maybe he was wrong. Levi wasn’t even the slightest bit of drunk, maybe tipsy, but he was still very much in control of himself. She, however, has been giggling quite more often and has frequently asked him to share a toast to which he obliged.

Rather than getting annoyed by her laughing over random things and asking him such as the side he sleeps on his bed, it was almost a relief to see her the way she was: free from whatever burden she had to carry.

“Okay! I-I think… I’ve had enough to drink…” She was still slightly conscious of her actions as she refused to finish half of the bottle and just stood up. “Great, now I just… have to wash all this off… or Camille’s going to kill me. Levi, would you like to… dance with me?” Offering him a hand, she gives him a wide smirk. Even when she was quite some distance away from the lamp, he could still see just how flushed her cheeks were from all that drinking, her eyelids looked like they would shut any minute now.

“No, thanks.”

She drops her hand and pouts, “You’re boring.”

“And you’re drunk.”

(Y/N) shrugs defeatedly and proceed to point to the field outside his window. “Then how about getting some fresh air? I’m sure that’s what _boring_ people do.”

Leaving the mess in the living room, they both went outside to the open field. Fortunately, the wind was warmer now, and it wouldn’t be such a pain to stand there without his blazer over his shirt. The crowds in the distance were fewer than when they left, but they could see most of them were still dancing around the fire. Looking back to the girl beside him, she was closing her eyes and spread her arms to the side slightly, as if feeling the warm wind blow satisfyingly against her face. The moment she opened her eyes, a single firefly landed on her nose. The way she giggled when she saw the glowing insect made Levi feel like his face was tingling, or numb, _or was he blushing?_

“We are in such a great timing, come on, I’ll show you.” (Y/N) walks further into the grassy field while Levi followed suit without hesitation. He was confused as to why she’d stop all of a sudden and faced her. “Come on, lay here beside me.”

“What- “

She lets herself fall slowly into the grass and numerous fireflies started to fill the air and illuminated the space where she used to be. It really was a sight to remember.

“Come on, Levi!”

A few inches from her, he starts to do the same with his arms spread to the sides. Although the grass felt slightly prickly against the exposed parts of his skin, it was quite comforting. And the fireflies doubled in number and seemed to be one with the stars on the sky.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” She asks without taking her eyes of the fireflies. When he glanced, her eyes were glittery with the reflection of the insects and the stars, and just pure awe.

“Yes.”

She moves her head to face him and back at the sky. Levi does the same as the fireflies slowly started to dissipate.

“Who would’ve thought.” There was more clarity in her words now than when they were inside, she probably is starting to sober up.

“Hm?”

“That we’d meet again under these circumstances. No gears, not on horses, and no one shouting to tell us to fight. Would the thought of _us_ doing things normal people do like now… ever cross your mind?”

It truly was something he’d never see himself do, considering all the hardships he went through his life _so far,_ it didn’t seem like he was offered room for peace. Let alone a room for simple and _precious_ moments like this. “Never thought of it, actually. This all feels very new to me.”

“Yeah, about that…” She leans on her right elbow to face him with such a confused look, “Why were you so nice to me today? It’s like I’m looking at a whole new person right now.”

 _“Huh?”_ It was normal for Levi to see people be scared by his very presence, but having people think that he’s incapable of being kind seems to put him off. But looking back to all those times they butt heads at the headquarters, maybe he really was unknowingly mean all the time.

“Don’t _‘huh’_ me, do you perhaps… _like_ me?”

“I-“

“Actually, don’t answer that.” She sighs as she lays back down on the grass. “Otherwise, I’d possibly be disappointed by my own assumptions and perception.” _Assumptions and perception?_ Levi wasn’t intoxicated enough to be this confused. “What I really want to ask you is… do you trust me now?”

She stares at him, waiting for his response as the sounds of crickets chirping and the grass brushing against the wind filled the silence. Levi recalls the exact moment he knew…

“When you called out my name before you lost your consciousness, I felt something I couldn’t quite explain. I could have just left you there and fled, but a part of me thought that I had to pick the decision I’d regret the least.”

She giggles lazily as if she’s already run out of energy. “You didn’t answer my question. But I’d like to believe that you already trust me well enough to show me this side of you, am I wrong?”

Levi doesn’t respond but looks at her as she closes her eyes. She exhales heavily and a small smile crept upon her face.

“Would it be selfish if I asked you to be the way you are now, _only to me?_ ”

Levi felt some sense of seriousness to her words, but at the same time, he brushes it off as some kind of drunk talk that she wouldn’t have meant or wouldn’t dare to say when sober. Still, he wanted to believe that there was someone, at least one, who would accept this vulnerable part of him.

“I can’t think of anyone else who’d want to see me like this. And I can’t think of anyone else _I’d_ like to see me like this. That is if you swear that whatever happens between us, stays between us.”

A light snore fills the air. She fell asleep, just like that. She probably didn’t even hear a word he said, or if she did, she was just too drunk to listen and understand. Levi uses his elbows for support as he stood up, looking for a way to pick her up without accidentally waking her. He carefully slides his arms under her knees and on the top part of her back. Slowly, he carries her back inside and up to his bedroom.

As he puts her down on his bed, she unconsciously yanked his arm forwards causing him to fall close enough to feel her warm breathing against his face. It took Levi a few moments before he could process the whole incident and slowly regained his balance.

The moonlight illuminated most of her face, and it was peaceful. It was as if she’d left all her worries behind and entered a much better world in her dreams. He covers her with a blanket up to her chest and leaves the room.

_“Sweet dreams.”_

* * *

Levi wakes up in a rather uncomfortable position when he noticed it was getting too warm. He was surprised to see that he had a blanket over him when he didn’t get a chance to grab one last night. He could hear the neighborhood coming to life once more just outside his door. Sitting up on the couch and stretching his sore body, he notices a sweet smell coming from the kitchen.

But before he became conscious enough to walk to the next room, he wonders why the whole living room was clean, like satisfyingly clean. His day seems to have gone with a good start, especially because he just had the longest sleep he’s ever had in such a long time.

The thought that maybe (Y/N) was in the kitchen cooking up tasty food made Levi smile to himself. He hurries to the kitchen and calls out. But there was no response. Strange.

However, there was a plate with a thick stack of pancakes on the table with a flower vase on the side. They smelled so good that Levi was salivating. Taking notice of the flower vase, a card hung on one of the stems.

> Levi,
> 
> Thanks for all the things we did yesterday, I didn’t know just how much I needed that. Also, I wanted to thank you for letting me stay in. So, I made you pancakes and cleaned the mess from last night. Don’t worry, I didn’t steal anything from your pantry. So, eat well.
> 
> There are still so many reasons for me to thank you, and I promise that I’ll give back for all of those soon. But for now, I still have a lot more things to settle. Don’t look for me at Camille’s, I’ve probably already gone far by the time you read this letter.
> 
> I’ll see you in a week.
> 
> Take care,
> 
> (Y/N)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was pretty IA because of school lately!! I mean, I still do have a lot of stuff to finish, but I suddenly had a burst of energy and decided to finish this chapter which, if you haven't noticed, is much longer than what I usually write sksksks :DDDD And yes, I do love to write about my characters being under the sunset or literally any orange lighting that exists lmaoo
> 
> Speaking of chapters, CH137 really blew me away and had me feel so many emotions at the same time :')
> 
> Thank you for your continuous support of this story!!! Let's hope I get more free time to update more and more frequently hehe <33333


End file.
